tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21470687427875190842024-03-19T02:12:38.009-07:00Aisle's Experience Till The IceAisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.comBlogger50125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-41001249580796293722014-04-27T09:01:00.001-07:002014-04-27T09:01:54.675-07:00Life Without You It had been quite sometime since i talked to you. And it had been quite sometime since i last saw you. Few years have gone and i still miss your presence around me. I forgot some of the details on your face but i still remember how we chat last time, having meals at the temple, having roti canai nearby home and all. These are the very best moments i had with you and i regretted for not having more time with you. For all these years i had lived with you, i think i spent very less time with you as i was too busy with friends, work and bla bla bla. Stlll, i admire the way you showed love around people, your kindness and politeness, your willingness to help and so on. I admit that i did learnt some of those values that you had but i have not learn it all yet. I wish time would turn back and you would teach me more about life and what life is all about. Now, i am learning it step by step and growing into a man. Life is not that easy like what i predicted but i know as long as i have the determination, i can overcome almost everything that comes to me. Until now, i still miss your laugh, your wisdom and your love. I still remember how smart you are when you knew almost all the routes around malaysia especially K.L. I still remember how happy we are when we bring the dog out for a walk and i would ask you questions and you would answer like you have gone through everything. Indeed, you had gone through most of the tough times in life to give me what i had today and to groom me into a better man. Unfortunately, you are not here by my side now but it is alright as you will always be in my heart , forever and ever. And i would think about you whenever i am at home, at work or at anywhere because i know that you want to see me change, you want to see me being a successful man and most importantly, you want to see me to be like you - wise, loving and smart. Thank you dad for teaching me so much in this life. Without you, i would be a paper full with dirt and stains. You cleaned me, you taught me from zero and you take care of me like no other. I love you, dad.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-27456342414363486542012-01-15T09:25:00.000-08:002012-01-15T10:09:22.550-08:00I hope<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>I hope. I hope i was not that dumb in doing this. Easy said than done. I admit that i'm good in talking and not quite ok in getting it done. Giving out too much pain and disappointment s just making me a bit useful than cloth . Even the cloth makes people feel better after getting itself dirty . Maybe i had adopted attitude of take it for granted. I do feel bad sometimes and thinking some way yet it came back to the beginning of the problem. I knew i disappointed her too many times that i can be forgiven. The pain. The tears. Disappointment. Promises. Saying the same thing again and again. It's just repetitive and this may just make things worse. Everytime this happens, me as always, stunned and acted like a standing wood and just as still as the sea. Yes, i do feel useless at times for not able to figure out the solutions and ways to tackle or overcome the awkwardness. The silence filling all the room for conversation and it stayed there for as long as possible until i can say something out from my mouth. I do enjoy all the happy moments and i do not one time regret what i've done with her. But when it comes to this, i can say that i'm just like a person that can't talk at that moment. Where's the time when i can talk just anything? Where i can make her smile again and again? I wish i can bring less pain and disappointment and give out more happiness and love. I knew this is not the end. This is just the beginning. I know i can fix it. Matter is how?Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-18579397803081623022011-08-07T06:53:00.002-07:002011-08-07T07:12:58.672-07:00My daddy<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>I miss you,dad. I miss spending time with you and having breakfast together every sunday morning. I miss when you calls me and ask how am i doing. I miss the time when you and mom come to my university to visit me . My dad is a jovial person. He always like to joke about silly stuff(i suppose) and my friends will comment that my dad is a funny person. When i was a kid, he will take me out and bring me to somewhere happy. We would bring the dog out for a walk every night after dinner and talk. I still remember he brings me to pasar malam every tuesday and i would buy a lot of stuff . I knew my dad loves the dog very very much and he would pat the dog every night he comes home and gives the dog a bath every weekend. He loves xiu mai very much and he loves to eat near the temple few yards from our house. We would walk there every sunday and he would order fried food (his favourite) and i would eat with him with my sister. My dad never really get emo before as i know it because he is the good heart man and my mom used to say that i should learn his goodman attitude as i get piss off very easily. That is why now i am on the anger management thingy although i know that i do not get angry a lot except in games. Maybe i put too much focus in games that i get upset easily when i lose the game. This upset thing needs to get into studies and if this happens, i am sure my results would go like flying colors in no time. I got my dad's watch with me and a photo of him in my room. I also got one of his shirts in my bag. My dad is a noble man. He forgives easily and he never scolds me although i got a bad results. He would say,"You can do better than this" and i regretted for not giving my best when he is here with me. I regretted for taking my dad for granted but one thing for sure is that i love him and i will always do because i know he loves me too. I am sorry,dad. I promise i will make it up to you and i love you.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-73668445014175821642011-04-10T08:22:00.000-07:002011-04-10T08:58:04.768-07:00It's been a long time ..<div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>Hmmmm, how long have i not blog ? very long. I know there is noone reading so i blog very little recently. Good news . I'm in love with this girl. It felt abit weird from the beginning and i wondered before how i fell for her. I did not know until i realized it and i did not regret falling in love with her as she helped me a lot in my daily life and "tapao" lunch for me. She is not like other ordinary girl because i don't think she is ordinary at all. She is the president of some clubs, busy with events and she is too good to her friends. Which part of her attracts me? I have a lot to say about this because she had a lot of things that i don't know about before this and i think i need to know her more to give her more love and appreciation for what she had done for me. I haven't do a thing touching or worth saying yet but i am working on it. She don't want me to wake her up at 7am because she wants me to get more sleep;she don't want me to skip lunch because she knows that i can get gastric easily if i did not take my lunch; she will accompany me along the way when i am driving on the road even though i told her to get some rest; she shared with me her scarf when i felt cold in the cinema the other day and she did not mind if i fell asleep halfway messaging with her. There a lot more that she did and i haven't ask her to be my girlfriend yet, how dumb am i. She is helpful, too kind to others and she never blamed others for what they did wrong. She will just say what she did wrong and not look from other people's perspective. I tried to say that it's not her fault but she will just take all the blame onto herself and i feel sad seeing her taking all the blame by herself. </div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span>Oh, i haven't talk about which part of her attracts me. Maybe it's her spirit and her passion that pulls me towards her. Other than her natural beauty, i think that the sacrifice she made is one of the most important thing made me fell for her. She is just too committed into doing something and would not stop until it is done. I asked her to secretly go back room to get rest or have a bath and she insisted that she wanna stay although she knew that she is already exhausted and tired. I think i was too shy in communicating with her and i need to be more caring and show more affection towards her . She always say me sweet talk and maybe i am just sweet-talking too much that she get a bit suspicious of it. I think. I am still thinking of when to ask her to be my girlfriend as this is important for me. She is important to me. I fell for her. I like her. I love her. And i do not want to lose her. </div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space:pre"> </span></div>Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-37125840541255716812010-10-03T13:01:00.000-07:002010-10-03T13:10:28.737-07:00It is disappointing.I didn't know what happen to me these few months. Things just keep changing, including me. I did change to good for a while but the unwanted attitude came back to me just few weeks before this and i have noone to blame but to blame myself. I was playful. I was silly. I was unaware of my situation. I was careless. It was terrible. Unimaginable. Over. Test 1 results are out and i failed most of it. It was disappointing. I don't know what to do. I am walking forward blindly. I was not careful enough. I slacked off. 21 days changes were abandoned. What am i gonna tell them this wednesday? It is still early? I wasn't even focused in anything at all? Worrying now is not worth it. I need immediate action. Example? I am still figuring this out. Hope i get through this semester and if I don't predict the worst scenario, the worst scenario will be expecting me. I need not to change but to focus and focus and focus. This is too important for me. What am i busying with? I will no excuse for this time failure and i do not want to try this again. Procrastination kills me slowly.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-83816024541642104092010-08-04T21:59:00.000-07:002010-08-04T22:08:13.529-07:00Realize and improviseI realize where the problem is just now when i was laying in my bed. My problem is that i am too focused at the laptop. I am trying to find something to do at my laptop rather than reading a book or even a slide of lecture notes. This seems very bad and i need to do something to change this situation. I need to put a book beside the laptop 24 hours a day and when i see the book beside me i will realize that i am too addicted to the internet and may take a look at the book. I have to keep a clear and straight mind now as i want to be more excellent than last semester. Last semester was all rubbish but i learned something out of it. So, i am not going to repeat my mistakes again this semester. No more failures, for now. I need to remind myself all the time that i am still a scholar and i am not going to stop or get kick out just like that. I cannot afford to bear the consequences if i were to be kicked out by the university. Leaders always think of the worst consequences does not mean that they will not think of the best out of it. We got to think big, think wisely and if a mistake occurs, take it as a lesson and move on. Do not do anything stupid that will harm yourself as this is useless and only makes your family more worry about you. You have to look at the present because if you do not work hard at the present time, what will happen in the future? Only God knows.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-933488301651887302010-08-01T11:17:00.000-07:002010-08-01T11:34:22.585-07:00Comes right by.How will you feel if failure comes after failure? I seriously do not like the feeling of this but it is only temporary as i am gonna change the future. Failure after failure? No problem. It is for us to learn and realise what is wrong and right. Sometimes we just cannot take things too seriously as it will cause us tension and discomfort in out heart. We have to let it go. Pain comes and goes. It does not stay long because it is for you to experience, not to stick with during your whole life. We gotta open our mind up. Some things can be done and some things cannot be done even if you forced it to. It would not happen and lessen the dreaming part. We got to look at the reality. It is not about dream anymore. It's about how you face the reality and get over it. We cannot just stop at a certain failure and be stagnant. Learn and move on so that we will not repeat the mistake again and again. What if you wanna love someone but you do not dare to? Loving someone can be painful or the other way round. It always comes back to the origin. How do you see things. Do you think that loving someone is painful? It is hard to say. When the time comes, there is no need to hold on to the end and make both sides suffer the consequences. When it is time to let go, let go. There is nothing to regret about it as you love that person truthfully and when love have to end, there is no way stopping it. You are just forcing yourself going through a harder time with the other partner and this hurts both sides. When you let go, think about the past is alright and these are all memories that is worth keeping. If you are not able to let something pass through your mind, you will carry that in your mind for a long time and it will deteriorates you physically and mentally. Like me, i am being pulled into a tough situation as i haven't let go what i should have let go long time ago. I will just thinking of it everyday and this "thing" is gonna consume me one day . Until now, i am still trying to get over it and it seems impossible but if you are willing to let it go someday in the future, you will feel much more freedom,relief and happiness around you rather than keeping those painful memories with you until you die.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-66012916494157614422010-07-25T10:57:00.000-07:002010-07-25T11:42:06.879-07:00Promise.I am back at my university. It is a cold night. Everybody is asleep except me? I don't know. I am still waiting for the train to come. Waiting and waiting. I waited for more than two hours. The train is still far from where it should be. I am losing my patience. Time is running out. I am feeling colder each second. Cold wind travels into the station through wind and i can feel the chill as i am half naked. My mind is getting tired and i just keep rubbing my hands. The cold was unavoidable. I had expected the worst. This is just the starting. Wait until midnight. It could be disaster. I am sleepy and tired and my mind is reacting negatively. This is not good. I just need to have patience for a while more. I believe the train will come. It will,will it? Doubts starts to form in my brain.It was not the end of my life. The cold just keep coming and my determination did not fade just like that because i am very confident that the train will come at any time now. It is already half past two. There are nobody at the station except me and the chilling weather. I heard the sound of the animals at night and i was wondering if they could bring me to where i want to go. I start to imagine. Walls and roads start to form in front of me and i was brought into another place within my mind and the cold went off for a while. I can feel the sun above me and sweats just flow down my face and i knew that i was at the station once again at noon. I am still alone at the station and i looked around for faces. What i saw was nothing more than a station and silence had been filling the station for quite a while. I was worried. The clock had stopped and i do not know the time. Suddenly, i heard the sound of a cat calling for its children. The sound came from far far away and i did not want to follow where the sound goes as i am lost as well. I felt the cold again. It was a weird feeling because i still see the sun above me and sweats are still on my face. Am i dreaming? Is this a fantasy? Am i getting insane? I am not. At last, i saw the head of the train appear from the hillside and i knew that i was going to board the train.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-29395244042994054942010-06-08T07:26:00.000-07:002010-06-08T07:37:11.641-07:00TearI was not feeling well these few days after i left my university. This is a disaster. I don't know what is happening to me and i hope that i will recover as soon as possible. It maybe because of the air-condition i think. I did not know that my air-condition can do so much damage to me in just a few hours. Or am i still haven't recover mentally and emotionally. Yesterday i looked through the window and i was thinking i don't know what is it now. Forgotten. This cannot go any further. If this go any further, i will die soon. Joking. I am trying to get used to sleeping in my own house. This will get better soon. I am always positive, am i? Today was a bad day. I just keep sneezing and sneezing and sneezing all the way to evening after i took a sleep that i felt better. Thank god i did not bring the sneeze to the other day. Hope tomorrow i will not be sneezing again. It sucks. I have to wear my jacket and i looked good in jacket too. Not bad. No more emotions please. This is digusting and ugly. I don't wanna mix up my life with stupid emotions that bring me down to hell and bring me up again to heaven. It is painful for me and i don't wanna do this again. I just want my normal life back. Go to cousin's house for basketball, jogging around my house and have a nice day everyday. Ya. This is my life. No more any of this. I will embrace myself once and forever as i never felt this before and i guess i learn a lot from this experience and i just wanna keep this as a memory, not present.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-39830711523487363212010-06-05T07:42:00.000-07:002010-06-05T07:56:44.368-07:00ExceptionI just need more time. To forget you. Get over with this. This poison is consuming me and i called it love. Well, it's not easy for me though. Listening to love song and remembering you is just pulling me back into the past. I don't wanna do this again. It's sickening. I don't wanna have this feeling again. Knowing that you are in kl and i cannot meet you up as i miss you so much and i knew that you not missing me the way i miss you. Love is tough and it is a deadly poison if you do not handle it with care. It's dangerous and i had been infected with this virus. The missing virus as i named it and i want to get this poison out of me as soon as possible. This is gonna be tough as i keep looking at your profile everyday and checking on you everytime i am on facebook. I have to get you out of my head as i saw hope is leaving one by one as if i am losing one million red blood cells per day and this is killing me. My hands are on my phone 24 hours wanting to message you and i know i must not message you as i know we can advance no more and it is impossible for both of us. The worst thing is that i still have a big problem with my academics and my family as well. I don't wanna put anymore pressure and burden into myself by indulging in love. I need to clear my studies now and i need more than full focus into this matter as this is my top priority now and i am still trying my best to change my attitude. The last few weeks was not my hell and now that i am at home, i will be doing a lot of work for my mum and there will be arguments as usual and i have to get over this too. Am i experiencing depression? I hope not. I got to be positive as this is just the beginning of my twenties and i don;t wanna screw it like a punctured balloon. Got to hold up and pull this through. I just want you to know that i will always have a place to put you in my heart and i don't wanna regret doing this the second time.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-7056215213162992422010-06-01T03:37:00.001-07:002010-06-01T03:42:49.256-07:00Holiday?Exam just finished. Friends asked me out but i don't feel like going out. Need to reflect what i had done today. Oh god. Forget about it. It's holiday isn't it? Study without sleep and going into the hall taking the exam and after the exam,it is almost 16 hours . I need to hold on till tonight. Need to have a balanced lifestyle back. No more late night sleep. It's killing me. My eyes look like some panda eyes and i feel so tired. And my face. Destroyed despite the fact that i slept late for so many days. This is going from bad to worst. I need to go back and have treatment as soon as possible. This is not good at all. It sucks. I was shocked about my face although i know that i am not very handsome but this is gone far worst then i thought. Going out for dinner soon and i need to bath now. Continue later when i come back . Damn .Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-43021629391365475632010-05-24T12:03:00.000-07:002010-05-24T12:15:55.323-07:00The LOAD.OMG. Tomorrow i have another paper to go. Don't really feel like studying though. Slept 2 hours just now. Gonna start studying now after updating this blog. After this, i maybe more busy as the last 2 subjects are the subjects i plan to kill for long. No sleep and study all day is tired and i think that MCD is quite a good place study although there maybe people around and thee internet interfering. I studied well there though and i took some time to rest myself. Surf the internet for few minutes. Listen to House of MiXX. When i got back here, i don't have the feeling to study. Why? Is there something here disturbing the calmness of my soul? I don't know. I have been seeing the dawn for almost 2 weeks and this is not good. Everybody was sleeping when i was studying and everybody is studying when i was studying too. That 's a double and i don't care cause i know i can endure all this tiredness and past through this thing is a short while as i have to start to think about holiday and i thought maybe i can end this once and for all. I still have new semester coming soon though and i will not give up at this place this time this second. I don't wanna fail again and again. The feeling of not getting good results is like you are the lowest class in this so-called hierarchical university? I don't know and i don't care. I just wanna get myself out of here as fast as possible as i don't wanna face the book anymore. This is exhausting and tiring. Yet i know that this is not a problem for me and i just need to try harder. Six more days to go and i am a temporary free man. I want my life back and i want my friends back. Friends back in the past who i have lost contact with. This is so shit man. I almost lost all my KL friends and i knew that when i go back to KL, i will do not much of a thing at home except online, games and tvs. Nothing more than a kampung boy can do. I wanna change that. Being stuck at home during that period of time is suffering and i hope that i will make this holiday the beneficial one and i do not regret it again. But now, back to the books. Alright then, time is calling me.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-89030660269475089882010-05-17T13:54:00.000-07:002010-05-17T14:02:12.215-07:00Why neVER?Why NeVER? I also don't know. Don't ask me. You are the one with the answer and yet i don't understand you. Maybe i was fooling with love too much that the angel of love gave me an arrow in the heart and my heart was not able to sustain the pain and cracks. Just a crack. Nothing more. The crack stopped right there and i am going make sure that this heart passes through the final cautiously with anymore pressure from the angel of love. I was too foolish to mess with love. I was immature. I needed a lesson and the angel gave me one and the only one that woke me up from my sweet sweet dream. I woke up wondering what had happened after all i had done without rational thinking. This is a huge mistake. I knew it from the start and i did not expect it to end this badly. It was not that bad though as my friends are there and i understand that it was my fault to be too reckless in doing all this. I realized my mistakes. Angel of love,give me no more lesson like this and i promise to be more serious in love and no more playful act. Now having final exam and i am still thinking about this. Better throw it off my mind for a while. Maybe this will change me in the future? Who knows. It's 5.01am now and i am still sitting here, eyes half-closed and sleepy. I need a sleep. Nite.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-55331286712021537932010-05-15T18:24:00.000-07:002010-05-15T18:49:56.753-07:00HUh?Huh? That's what i get when i did something reckless on that day. It was the worse day ever. Tears feel like coming out of my eyes. My heart sank. There is nothing i can do about it. What you expect from doing these silly thing. Oh my God. Can't believe that i did it. LOL. It's the past. Still, i envy my friends who has settled down and i am happy for them. For me, guess the time is not here yet. Got to wait longer and no more doind those silly things. It was ... i don't know,i did not even think about the consequences at that time. I was stupid,playful and childish. It was not the best move and i would say that it is the worst thing i ever did as i never try doing it before this that my friend encourage to so i am still here writing stories for you.<br /> It is 9.36 am now. My finals starts tomorrow. Wish me luck. Although the emotions are all stuck in my head, i tried my best getting them out and make them vanish. Played NFS just now and did not manage to overcome one of the stages. I think i tried it for more than 50 times. Almost 2 hours playing the same game on the same route. Dota? Nah. Finals. Got to study . Alone Mayb? Nope. My friends are all sleeping like pigs right now. The wind blows over my skin and i can feel the exhaustion beneath my body. It is going to be a hectic week that i am going to face my final test and hope that i can pull my pointer up a bit. Better than nothing. OMG. My back hurts and i think i am having inflammation in my stomach. The feeling is terrible but nothing is more terrible than what i experienced yesterday. Almost gone to a fight but sleep intercepted so i will just wait. No more explanation is needed and i will not further elaborate on what had happened yesterday. It is going to be a miracle if it did not happen this way.<br /> No big deal. It is just all about feelings. Expression of feelings. Oh god.I am having stomach pain again. Did not know what is wrong with it and hope that i will get over this soon.<br />I feel so tired right now. I am going to sleep in a minute as someone is sleeping on my bad now. I am so sick of bitches and i hope that i will not come across another kind of same incident again. SLeep is calling me,got to go. Will update soon after my finals .Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-21261182712079356192010-04-30T10:20:00.000-07:002010-04-30T10:35:28.816-07:00DullLife has been very dull for me these few days. Next week i have two tests waiting to kill me. DAMN. Studying now but studying alone is very boring and i get sleepy all the time. Food? Had enough though but now eating big apple donuts and i am really getting some weight here. Imagine you are alone in your room reading the lecture slides,listening to music and eating donuts. It totally sucks. Guess what? My mates are having at Ipoh now. They are hitting the club tonight and i am in my room studying. OMG. Fine. Still my life is dull and i do not deny that and i hope my life would be more fun. If my leg is healed by now, i would go play basketball or jogging or even cycling as i need to release my stress from my whole body. So what am i gonna do now? Study? LOL? I don't have much choice, do i? I wanna go back KL !!! Wallet is almost dry too due to excessive spending on food. I have been going mamak alot these two weeks and sleeping late too. No good. Better stop now and go back to my study before i fall asleep again.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-23252727414054043872010-04-26T03:41:00.000-07:002010-04-26T04:06:27.037-07:00It's had been a whileWow, did not realize that i have not been updating my blog for almost six months. DAMN. Lazy may be the right excuse but now here i am updating my status and announcing latest news. Been really busy these few months. Don't know what to write now as it's raining. She is in the IRC. I am in my room. Did not know how i fall for her, did not know why i fall for her and did not know whether should i fall for her or not. It's has been a while since i knew her. Few months?. Maybe. People are telling me to act fast, and i mean fast but i was hesitating all the time. Should i? Confession has always been a norm in my life and it is not hard. The hard thing is that am i onto the right one? What if i made a mistake? Rejection? It's alright? NO? I also don't know.<br /> Gonna work on my finals soon. Time is running off the clock and i really have to pay attention now as i do not want to disappoint my parents again. Gotta look forward. Not focusing at my past but in the future. Things have to change. Things got to change. Things are changing. So am i. Let's throw away all the tension and sadness and focus on study. Love is gonna come later so wait. Jogging? Spraint my leg. Have to wait for another 7 days. Sigh.<br /> So missing my friends in KL so much. It's a new year now and i have not been contacting them and i feel really guilty. Never mind. Gonna back in KL on 2nd June. The sad thing is that they may not be in KL. I think they might go holiday with their parents and some of them are still studying overseas as you know the schedule of the oversEAS. LOL. Hungry . When am i going to have my lunch? DAMN. Just finished my field trip yesterday. Tired taking all the apparatus and standing under the sun from 2pm to 6pm. Exhausted. Crazy. Maniac. Lucky i get to drink one cup of Heineken at the last day. Ate the lunch provided but skipped the others and ate outside. No pork though and it is a small town. Boring. Slept in the hall instead of the room provided because you can imagine my suffering if you sleep in a room with another nine people with just one fan spinning so slow that you can almost catch one of its wings.<br /> Sleeping time is getting off and off the clock. 4am? Nuts. Gonna try to sleep earlier tonight. Wonders what she is doing sleeping this late. Assignment? No way. Chatting? I guess so. Ignorable. Love is complicated so i will just solve this question later then. Alright. Stop now. Dinner first.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-21307935234064411362010-01-14T20:28:00.001-08:002010-01-14T20:39:57.494-08:00January...Here is the starting of a new year and it's January! First thing first,results. DArn, the credits i get is lower than i expected. A bit disappointed though but i am sure i will work harder in this coming new semester. Nothing has been done this holiday, i don't know what to do during this two months so i just sat at home resting trying to get over my terrible cough for months and helping my mum with some stuff. After i get my results,i am scared and scared and still scared. SCARED. Scared that my mum will scold me like an angry lion and nagging me even i am sleeping. Afraid that she will some into my dream and scold me. There is one thing though that my friend told me just now. He told me that i have to tell my mum now or later she will cooked me up. So,i have decided to tell her later. Earlier scolding the better for me and for us. Ignore the results,now back to the new year celebration. Chinese new year is coming and i am sure that everyone is very anxious to get into it as early as possible. Maybe i will not be coming back for home this new year because our school had given us 2 months of holiday and you expect them to further more increase the period of holiday? DREAM ON!! . So,it's time to straighten your feelings and get yourself back into academics ... AGAIN. I just cannot wait to go back to school and run away from home as i have nothing to do at home except tv and computer and some housework. Wanted to work but feeling lazy. OOpps. Excuse. Just an excuse. xD. Don't worry. Next semester break i will be working somewhere for sure. Hope that i will have a good time at school and have better results in the next few months. Good luck to anyone out there in whatever that they are doing and hope that everything goes well for everyone this year.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-37429512173464166522009-12-22T05:46:00.000-08:002009-12-22T06:00:41.455-08:00Positive,aren't you?Are you being positive right now? I am sure you are. Why? Because i believe you. You are not just any human on this Earth. You are You. You are special. So am i. Even the people who are homeless, they are special. They know how to survive without having a proper place to stay. They can linger here and there. Anywhere. They know how to earn money. They are special. So are you. So why are you feeling negative right now? Are you? Think about it. I am always on the negative side too. I am quite a bad-tempered person as you have not taste the other side of me. If you have ever see my angry expression, you will be afraid , you will fear me. But in the normal days, i am just an ordinary boy thinking positive and negative at the same time. Negative have been on my mind for a long time. I am sick of negative. I want to try, i want to know, i want to experience the positive. Positive may bring me more surprises that i can think of. Isn't that right? It is true that positive can bring you more prosperity and happiness. What can negative possibly give you? Anger? Worry? Suicide ? Everything on the corrupted side can bring you all these uneasy feelings. Don't try to be positive. Be positive. Trying something will only make you stand in between two different boundaries. You must do it. I will try my best means i will only do to the extend that i want. If i do my best, i will give out everything that i have and will not feel regret for doing it. Don't ever say that you will try. I know you will not dare to try because you want to sit in your comfort zone. That is just not right. Change. If you believe that you can do it, act from it and i will assure you that you will see the results that you want.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-62027035929578859772009-12-15T06:46:00.000-08:002009-12-18T07:28:08.365-08:00Money...Money. Do you love money? If you don't love money,you are not human. They are people who loves money but they are also people who do not put money as their first choice. Is money that important in our life? Yes. Definitely. The only question is whether you think you have enough money in your account or not. Most people will think that they don't have enough money in their life and they wanted more. Why? Because money can buy almost everything in our life. Cars,houses,luxuries,anything that has a price tag on their body can be buy. Even the millionaires think that they don't have enough money in their life. Why? Because they want more from their life and they want to buy everything in the world. They don't care how much the thing cost, they only that if they want the thing, they must get it no matter how much it costs. These people are going after materials and they are quite realistic in their life. Ok. Now, we divert our topic to the youngsters. Nowadays,upper class families usually give their children one or two hundred every time the children want to go out. Can you see that these parents don't care much about what the children use the money for but they focus on the happiness that the children will get after having the money. For the middle class families, they will always monitor their children account, ask them to make a bank book by writing down all the things they bought, where the money goes. Is it so important to monitor their account down to every cent they use? I don't think so. As long as u know what they use the money for, i think it's alright to give the child some money to buy what they like. Money is always a very serious issue in our country as the government are having these people taking bribes and this is getting worst in our country as the oil is depleting and it's a matter time before the Petronas of our country is out of oil and what our country going to do without the main industry? It's still a question.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-3077196980495017662009-12-13T09:30:00.000-08:002009-12-13T09:41:21.433-08:00Life is still lifeRecently,i have been enjoying my life so far. Problem arises,problem ceases. It's just a routine life. Bored with it. Holiday. Nothing much to do. Just walk around the city,do a bit shopping and went to relative's house. Nice holiday. Imagine. 2 girls fell in love with you at the same time. Damn. Cannot imagine that though. It's just tough. Hah. Not easy. But what if you don't even like the both of them( ALthough they don't know each other,i mean the 2 girls). It's kinda hard to reject them. And the main problem is, you fell in love with another girl. That just amazing man. you have your dreamgirl and yet two other girls like you so much. Nothing much you can do really. Act them as normal friends. Greet them as usual. And you all are still friends. I have people suffer from this problem before. Having more than 20 short relationships before,this girl have not been able to find her true love and she still haven't give up. What a daring girl. Moving on when she had most of the hardest time alone in her room sobering. She is still single at the moment and she said that she will keep on trying and jope that luck and faith will be on her side when she finds her true love. Another guy, handsome,well-educated,smart also have the same problem as he had had the kind of experience as what this girl had gone through. I read on newspaper saying think like a woman,act like a man.Although i don't really understand the meaning of that, i am still trying to find out what that really means.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-7666897300891594392009-12-09T00:49:00.000-08:002009-12-09T05:43:01.636-08:00Upside DownRecently,my life hadn't been very stable. Emotions are building up and guess what? I get more emotional. Damn. I was about to move on when i have my own problems in my present life. If it is like that, how can i even think about forgetting the past? Quite amazing though. Right now,i am quite upset about my emotions and not able to keep still. Watching all those videos that may inspire me, i haven't take control over my own emotions yet and the process will continue until i am able to control my emotions. I was trying to really understand the meaning of The Secret fully and i am still in the process. It has been quite a long time and sometimes i may use it sometimes i may not. It's all about the timing and thoughts. It's not easy to really understand it though it seem easy for a three years old kid. I am going to really control my emotions now and be still. Learn to be still. Concentrate on what you want and what you don't want will fade away. I have this step in my mind all the time and i practice it too but i am still trying to master this because when i had fully mastered this, trust me, i can become very still and not nervous even in front of a thief.<br /> <br /> Although sometimes things weren't that smooth for me, i always keep my mind on the positive side and hope that i will be happy all the time. Emotions and stillness is the key to my future. I may be overemotional sometimes but there are always times when people lost control of themselves and emotions take over them. Emotions are always important in determining a person's attitude and appearance.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-70960804168886145412009-11-04T10:55:00.001-08:002009-11-04T10:56:22.439-08:00Losing my mind.... Recently.... Damn... Not good.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-15459179115120884952009-11-03T05:41:00.000-08:002009-11-03T06:07:00.072-08:00Smille?I was having my test today. Nervous of course. But it's just objective. Simple but complicated. Needs thinking. Calculating. Estimating.Predicting.Memorizing. More. People went out fast and early. When i left, there are only quarter of the students sitting at their places still. He smiles. During the test. Stretches his both hands. Smiles at me. When i look at him. Cannot identify what kind of smile is that. He said. He have not finish reading it half an hour before the exam starts. There he is. Smiling . At me. When i look. At him. I don't care. I was thinking. Blurring. Figuring out the answer. Guessing. A?.B?.C? or D?. Don't know. Don't understand. Don't care. It's had passed. Next. On thursday. One more day. I'm waiting. For it. The final Boom. Close .Near. Gonna. Explode.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-5255171101959475642009-10-30T11:54:00.000-07:002009-10-30T12:01:10.135-07:00Around the cornerAfter having a consecutive of tests in my campus, it's the time for the real test. What test? Final exam of course. It's the hardest yet easiest exam if you have prepared fully before the exam. I almost flung all my tests except for some easy subjects such as basketball(basketball??) and English i think. It's has been a tiring week for me as i sleep at 5 or 6am everyday since the last two weeks. So tired. Yet,i tried my best to finish my assignment on time. If you can get full marks for assignment ,you may relax in the final exam. That is for last 2 semesters. Now, i am in a different level. Undergraduate. Not easy. Not hard. And i still have field trip. To kelantan. Now.In hotel.Me. Writing this. Damn. After the field trip,i still have reports to write and it's gonna take out my energy again. I will try my best ti find time to study. The time has come. It's not far from me. I can feel it. I am gonna die. Maybe not. I still can save a few subjects i think. HAHA. Wish me luck for my final exam.Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2147068742787519084.post-80640976147397115652009-10-26T21:02:00.001-07:002009-10-26T22:06:28.146-07:00Why Stress???Why stress??? LOL. That is what i always say. Today i just have our maths test and one of my friends did a small little mistake that make the whole answer wrong. He was so tension. SO TENSION. I was sitting beside him when the test is going and guess what, i don't even know what the question is talking and he was like writing so fast and i am quite sure that he will get it right as he is the smartest in my class. What happened is he got it wrong in the beginning and he was very upset about it and keeps on blaming himself. I try to calm him down but he said,"Don't disturb me!!". I was smiling and trying to make him to smile too and he scolded me. WTF. After that, he keep on talking about the mistake he made and he is quite emotional too. On the other side, another guy was sitting beside me and telling me that he know how to do and do it perfectly correct. Imagine you don't even understand the question and the guy was showing you his big smile and i feel like giving him a big slap on his balls to tell him that :: Hey!!! Stop showing off in front me or i will hit you with my fist. Then after 5 minutes only the guy beside realized that he had done something wrong. WAKAKA.<br /><br /> AFter that, we went on to the drawing test. It was kinda hard as we are drawing using a computer and it may look easy to you but when you try it, you will know its toughness and difficulty. So, the teacher gave us the question and when we are 15 minutes into the test, all computer shut down. WTF. All the students are shouting and scolding. I was relieved. You know why? Because i don't know how to draw and was asking my friends about it. It was not that hard after all. After the computer restart, we start all over again. All my friends were busy drawing and they draw very fast. Guess what, I was stuck at drawing the model and it did wasted alot of my time. DAMN. They are all drawing other stuff already and i was stuck there for half an hour. After finish drawing the model, our teacher say we are left with less than half an hour. OMG. I was like clicking the mouse here and there faster than the speed of a running rabbit. LOL. I did not finish the drawing. Too bad. Gonna fail again. LOL. The 'showing off' guy finish his drawing and ask me whether i finish o not and i told him,"Nah,don't know how to do." He is still smiling at the moment and say,"Don't pretend man,let me see your drawing." So, i showed it to him and he said it is good. When he said the word "GOOD", i feel like pushing him down to the floor and punch him. I looked at his and WTF, he finished it and ask me just to laugh at me and say i was pretending? I ain't pretending you sucker and i will remember the moment when you laugh and say my drawing is "GOOD". DAMN. It's like someone is laughing at you indirectly. Pretending? FUCK you. When he finished the things fast and he get it correctly, he will always put both of his hands up in the air and smile. Beside him is me still trying to figure out the question. Although i don't really like his attitude,somehow he is still my friend so what to do, tolerate lo...<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl7dztAa_ONq0zZGmXT4899unX0srFT5CNQzPy0miLHb6ctAQfLFfFOk9bMjvMXUidwpGfeH78MYH8sQI-YL6V_OOtWS_YA9OxBQoBrus99hN5SWNTqsDsfoBgrT0DBIzRc3_IqaqH4OJp/s1600-h/lonely-person.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 256px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl7dztAa_ONq0zZGmXT4899unX0srFT5CNQzPy0miLHb6ctAQfLFfFOk9bMjvMXUidwpGfeH78MYH8sQI-YL6V_OOtWS_YA9OxBQoBrus99hN5SWNTqsDsfoBgrT0DBIzRc3_IqaqH4OJp/s320/lonely-person.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397141625456121394" border="0" /></a></div>Aisle9http://www.blogger.com/profile/00643008642274108741noreply@blogger.com0