Aisle's Experience Till The Ice

I hope

2012-01-15T09:25:00.000-08:00

I hope. I hope i was not that dumb in doing this. Easy said than done. I admit that i'm good in talking and not quite ok in getting it done. Giving out too much pain and disappointment s just making me a bit useful than cloth . Even the cloth makes people feel better after getting itself dirty . Maybe i had adopted attitude of take it for granted. I do feel bad sometimes and thinking some way yet it came back to the beginning of the problem. I knew i disappointed her too many times that i can be forgiven. The pain. The tears. Disappointment. Promises. Saying the same thing again and again. It's just repetitive and this may just make things worse. Everytime this happens, me as always, stunned and acted like a standing wood and just as still as the sea. Yes, i do feel useless at times for not able to figure out the solutions and ways to tackle or overcome the awkwardness. The silence filling all the room for conversation and it stayed there for as long as possible until i can say something out from my mouth. I do enjoy all the happy moments and i do not one time regret what i've done with her. But when it comes to this, i can say that i'm just like a person that can't talk at that moment. Where's the time when i can talk just anything? Where i can make her smile again and again? I wish i can bring less pain and disappointment and give out more happiness and love. I knew this is not the end. This is just the beginning. I know i can fix it. Matter is how?

My daddy

2011-08-07T06:53:00.002-07:00

I miss you,dad. I miss spending time with you and having breakfast together every sunday morning. I miss when you calls me and ask how am i doing. I miss the time when you and mom come to my university to visit me . My dad is a jovial person. He always like to joke about silly stuff(i suppose) and my friends will comment that my dad is a funny person. When i was a kid, he will take me out and bring me to somewhere happy. We would bring the dog out for a walk every night after dinner and talk. I still remember he brings me to pasar malam every tuesday and i would buy a lot of stuff . I knew my dad loves the dog very very much and he would pat the dog every night he comes home and gives the dog a bath every weekend. He loves xiu mai very much and he loves to eat near the temple few yards from our house. We would walk there every sunday and he would order fried food (his favourite) and i would eat with him with my sister. My dad never really get emo before as i know it because he is the good heart man and my mom used to say that i should learn his goodman attitude as i get piss off very easily. That is why now i am on the anger management thingy although i know that i do not get angry a lot except in games. Maybe i put too much focus in games that i get upset easily when i lose the game. This upset thing needs to get into studies and if this happens, i am sure my results would go like flying colors in no time. I got my dad's watch with me and a photo of him in my room. I also got one of his shirts in my bag. My dad is a noble man. He forgives easily and he never scolds me although i got a bad results. He would say,"You can do better than this" and i regretted for not giving my best when he is here with me. I regretted for taking my dad for granted but one thing for sure is that i love him and i will always do because i know he loves me too. I am sorry,dad. I promise i will make it up to you and i love you.

It's been a long time ..

2011-04-10T08:22:00.000-07:00

Hmmmm, how long have i not blog ? very long. I know there is noone reading so i blog very little recently. Good news . I'm in love with this girl. It felt abit weird from the beginning and i wondered before how i fell for her. I did not know until i realized it and i did not regret falling in love with her as she helped me a lot in my daily life and "tapao" lunch for me. She is not like other ordinary girl because i don't think she is ordinary at all. She is the president of some clubs, busy with events and she is too good to her friends. Which part of her attracts me? I have a lot to say about this because she had a lot of things that i don't know about before this and i think i need to know her more to give her more love and appreciation for what she had done for me. I haven't do a thing touching or worth saying yet but i am working on it. She don't want me to wake her up at 7am because she wants me to get more sleep;she don't want me to skip lunch because she knows that i can get gastric easily if i did not take my lunch; she will accompany me along the way when i am driving on the road even though i told her to get some rest; she shared with me her scarf when i felt cold in the cinema the other day and she did not mind if i fell asleep halfway messaging with her. There a lot more that she did and i haven't ask her to be my girlfriend yet, how dumb am i. She is helpful, too kind to others and she never blamed others for what they did wrong. She will just say what she did wrong and not look from other people's perspective. I tried to say that it's not her fault but she will just take all the blame onto herself and i feel sad seeing her taking all the blame by herself.

Oh, i haven't talk about which part of her attracts me. Maybe it's her spirit and her passion that pulls me towards her. Other than her natural beauty, i think that the sacrifice she made is one of the most important thing made me fell for her. She is just too committed into doing something and would not stop until it is done. I asked her to secretly go back room to get rest or have a bath and she insisted that she wanna stay although she knew that she is already exhausted and tired. I think i was too shy in communicating with her and i need to be more caring and show more affection towards her . She always say me sweet talk and maybe i am just sweet-talking too much that she get a bit suspicious of it. I think. I am still thinking of when to ask her to be my girlfriend as this is important for me. She is important to me. I fell for her. I like her. I love her. And i do not want to lose her.

It is disappointing.

2010-10-03T13:01:00.000-07:00

I didn't know what happen to me these few months. Things just keep changing, including me. I did change to good for a while but the unwanted attitude came back to me just few weeks before this and i have noone to blame but to blame myself. I was playful. I was silly. I was unaware of my situation. I was careless. It was terrible. Unimaginable. Over. Test 1 results are out and i failed most of it. It was disappointing. I don't know what to do. I am walking forward blindly. I was not careful enough. I slacked off. 21 days changes were abandoned. What am i gonna tell them this wednesday? It is still early? I wasn't even focused in anything at all? Worrying now is not worth it. I need immediate action. Example? I am still figuring this out. Hope i get through this semester and if I don't predict the worst scenario, the worst scenario will be expecting me. I need not to change but to focus and focus and focus. This is too important for me. What am i busying with? I will no excuse for this time failure and i do not want to try this again. Procrastination kills me slowly.

Realize and improvise

2010-08-04T21:59:00.000-07:00

I realize where the problem is just now when i was laying in my bed. My problem is that i am too focused at the laptop. I am trying to find something to do at my laptop rather than reading a book or even a slide of lecture notes. This seems very bad and i need to do something to change this situation. I need to put a book beside the laptop 24 hours a day and when i see the book beside me i will realize that i am too addicted to the internet and may take a look at the book. I have to keep a clear and straight mind now as i want to be more excellent than last semester. Last semester was all rubbish but i learned something out of it. So, i am not going to repeat my mistakes again this semester. No more failures, for now. I need to remind myself all the time that i am still a scholar and i am not going to stop or get kick out just like that. I cannot afford to bear the consequences if i were to be kicked out by the university. Leaders always think of the worst consequences does not mean that they will not think of the best out of it. We got to think big, think wisely and if a mistake occurs, take it as a lesson and move on. Do not do anything stupid that will harm yourself as this is useless and only makes your family more worry about you. You have to look at the present because if you do not work hard at the present time, what will happen in the future? Only God knows.

Comes right by.

2010-08-01T11:17:00.000-07:00

How will you feel if failure comes after failure? I seriously do not like the feeling of this but it is only temporary as i am gonna change the future. Failure after failure? No problem. It is for us to learn and realise what is wrong and right. Sometimes we just cannot take things too seriously as it will cause us tension and discomfort in out heart. We have to let it go. Pain comes and goes. It does not stay long because it is for you to experience, not to stick with during your whole life. We gotta open our mind up. Some things can be done and some things cannot be done even if you forced it to. It would not happen and lessen the dreaming part. We got to look at the reality. It is not about dream anymore. It's about how you face the reality and get over it. We cannot just stop at a certain failure and be stagnant. Learn and move on so that we will not repeat the mistake again and again. What if you wanna love someone but you do not dare to? Loving someone can be painful or the other way round. It always comes back to the origin. How do you see things. Do you think that loving someone is painful? It is hard to say. When the time comes, there is no need to hold on to the end and make both sides suffer the consequences. When it is time to let go, let go. There is nothing to regret about it as you love that person truthfully and when love have to end, there is no way stopping it. You are just forcing yourself going through a harder time with the other partner and this hurts both sides. When you let go, think about the past is alright and these are all memories that is worth keeping. If you are not able to let something pass through your mind, you will carry that in your mind for a long time and it will deteriorates you physically and mentally. Like me, i am being pulled into a tough situation as i haven't let go what i should have let go long time ago. I will just thinking of it everyday and this "thing" is gonna consume me one day . Until now, i am still trying to get over it and it seems impossible but if you are willing to let it go someday in the future, you will feel much more freedom,relief and happiness around you rather than keeping those painful memories with you until you die.

Promise.

2010-07-25T10:57:00.000-07:00

I am back at my university. It is a cold night. Everybody is asleep except me? I don't know. I am still waiting for the train to come. Waiting and waiting. I waited for more than two hours. The train is still far from where it should be. I am losing my patience. Time is running out. I am feeling colder each second. Cold wind travels into the station through wind and i can feel the chill as i am half naked. My mind is getting tired and i just keep rubbing my hands. The cold was unavoidable. I had expected the worst. This is just the starting. Wait until midnight. It could be disaster. I am sleepy and tired and my mind is reacting negatively. This is not good. I just need to have patience for a while more. I believe the train will come. It will,will it? Doubts starts to form in my brain.It was not the end of my life. The cold just keep coming and my determination did not fade just like that because i am very confident that the train will come at any time now. It is already half past two. There are nobody at the station except me and the chilling weather. I heard the sound of the animals at night and i was wondering if they could bring me to where i want to go. I start to imagine. Walls and roads start to form in front of me and i was brought into another place within my mind and the cold went off for a while. I can feel the sun above me and sweats just flow down my face and i knew that i was at the station once again at noon. I am still alone at the station and i looked around for faces. What i saw was nothing more than a station and silence had been filling the station for quite a while. I was worried. The clock had stopped and i do not know the time. Suddenly, i heard the sound of a cat calling for its children. The sound came from far far away and i did not want to follow where the sound goes as i am lost as well. I felt the cold again. It was a weird feeling because i still see the sun above me and sweats are still on my face. Am i dreaming? Is this a fantasy? Am i getting insane? I am not. At last, i saw the head of the train appear from the hillside and i knew that i was going to board the train.

Tear

2010-06-08T07:26:00.000-07:00

I was not feeling well these few days after i left my university. This is a disaster. I don't know what is happening to me and i hope that i will recover as soon as possible. It maybe because of the air-condition i think. I did not know that my air-condition can do so much damage to me in just a few hours. Or am i still haven't recover mentally and emotionally. Yesterday i looked through the window and i was thinking i don't know what is it now. Forgotten. This cannot go any further. If this go any further, i will die soon. Joking. I am trying to get used to sleeping in my own house. This will get better soon. I am always positive, am i? Today was a bad day. I just keep sneezing and sneezing and sneezing all the way to evening after i took a sleep that i felt better. Thank god i did not bring the sneeze to the other day. Hope tomorrow i will not be sneezing again. It sucks. I have to wear my jacket and i looked good in jacket too. Not bad. No more emotions please. This is digusting and ugly. I don't wanna mix up my life with stupid emotions that bring me down to hell and bring me up again to heaven. It is painful for me and i don't wanna do this again. I just want my normal life back. Go to cousin's house for basketball, jogging around my house and have a nice day everyday. Ya. This is my life. No more any of this. I will embrace myself once and forever as i never felt this before and i guess i learn a lot from this experience and i just wanna keep this as a memory, not present.

Exception

2010-06-05T07:42:00.000-07:00

I just need more time. To forget you. Get over with this. This poison is consuming me and i called it love. Well, it's not easy for me though. Listening to love song and remembering you is just pulling me back into the past. I don't wanna do this again. It's sickening. I don't wanna have this feeling again. Knowing that you are in kl and i cannot meet you up as i miss you so much and i knew that you not missing me the way i miss you. Love is tough and it is a deadly poison if you do not handle it with care. It's dangerous and i had been infected with this virus. The missing virus as i named it and i want to get this poison out of me as soon as possible. This is gonna be tough as i keep looking at your profile everyday and checking on you everytime i am on facebook. I have to get you out of my head as i saw hope is leaving one by one as if i am losing one million red blood cells per day and this is killing me. My hands are on my phone 24 hours wanting to message you and i know i must not message you as i know we can advance no more and it is impossible for both of us. The worst thing is that i still have a big problem with my academics and my family as well. I don't wanna put anymore pressure and burden into myself by indulging in love. I need to clear my studies now and i need more than full focus into this matter as this is my top priority now and i am still trying my best to change my attitude. The last few weeks was not my hell and now that i am at home, i will be doing a lot of work for my mum and there will be arguments as usual and i have to get over this too. Am i experiencing depression? I hope not. I got to be positive as this is just the beginning of my twenties and i don;t wanna screw it like a punctured balloon. Got to hold up and pull this through. I just want you to know that i will always have a place to put you in my heart and i don't wanna regret doing this the second time.

Holiday?

2010-06-01T03:37:00.001-07:00

Exam just finished. Friends asked me out but i don't feel like going out. Need to reflect what i had done today. Oh god. Forget about it. It's holiday isn't it? Study without sleep and going into the hall taking the exam and after the exam,it is almost 16 hours . I need to hold on till tonight. Need to have a balanced lifestyle back. No more late night sleep. It's killing me. My eyes look like some panda eyes and i feel so tired. And my face. Destroyed despite the fact that i slept late for so many days. This is going from bad to worst. I need to go back and have treatment as soon as possible. This is not good at all. It sucks. I was shocked about my face although i know that i am not very handsome but this is gone far worst then i thought. Going out for dinner soon and i need to bath now. Continue later when i come back . Damn .

The LOAD.

2010-05-24T12:03:00.000-07:00

OMG. Tomorrow i have another paper to go. Don't really feel like studying though. Slept 2 hours just now. Gonna start studying now after updating this blog. After this, i maybe more busy as the last 2 subjects are the subjects i plan to kill for long. No sleep and study all day is tired and i think that MCD is quite a good place study although there maybe people around and thee internet interfering. I studied well there though and i took some time to rest myself. Surf the internet for few minutes. Listen to House of MiXX. When i got back here, i don't have the feeling to study. Why? Is there something here disturbing the calmness of my soul? I don't know. I have been seeing the dawn for almost 2 weeks and this is not good. Everybody was sleeping when i was studying and everybody is studying when i was studying too. That 's a double and i don't care cause i know i can endure all this tiredness and past through this thing is a short while as i have to start to think about holiday and i thought maybe i can end this once and for all. I still have new semester coming soon though and i will not give up at this place this time this second. I don't wanna fail again and again. The feeling of not getting good results is like you are the lowest class in this so-called hierarchical university? I don't know and i don't care. I just wanna get myself out of here as fast as possible as i don't wanna face the book anymore. This is exhausting and tiring. Yet i know that this is not a problem for me and i just need to try harder. Six more days to go and i am a temporary free man. I want my life back and i want my friends back. Friends back in the past who i have lost contact with. This is so shit man. I almost lost all my KL friends and i knew that when i go back to KL, i will do not much of a thing at home except online, games and tvs. Nothing more than a kampung boy can do. I wanna change that. Being stuck at home during that period of time is suffering and i hope that i will make this holiday the beneficial one and i do not regret it again. But now, back to the books. Alright then, time is calling me.

Why neVER?

2010-05-17T13:54:00.000-07:00

Why NeVER? I also don't know. Don't ask me. You are the one with the answer and yet i don't understand you. Maybe i was fooling with love too much that the angel of love gave me an arrow in the heart and my heart was not able to sustain the pain and cracks. Just a crack. Nothing more. The crack stopped right there and i am going make sure that this heart passes through the final cautiously with anymore pressure from the angel of love. I was too foolish to mess with love. I was immature. I needed a lesson and the angel gave me one and the only one that woke me up from my sweet sweet dream. I woke up wondering what had happened after all i had done without rational thinking. This is a huge mistake. I knew it from the start and i did not expect it to end this badly. It was not that bad though as my friends are there and i understand that it was my fault to be too reckless in doing all this. I realized my mistakes. Angel of love,give me no more lesson like this and i promise to be more serious in love and no more playful act. Now having final exam and i am still thinking about this. Better throw it off my mind for a while. Maybe this will change me in the future? Who knows. It's 5.01am now and i am still sitting here, eyes half-closed and sleepy. I need a sleep. Nite.

HUh?

2010-05-15T18:24:00.000-07:00

Huh? That's what i get when i did something reckless on that day. It was the worse day ever. Tears feel like coming out of my eyes. My heart sank. There is nothing i can do about it. What you expect from doing these silly thing. Oh my God. Can't believe that i did it. LOL. It's the past. Still, i envy my friends who has settled down and i am happy for them. For me, guess the time is not here yet. Got to wait longer and no more doind those silly things. It was ... i don't know,i did not even think about the consequences at that time. I was stupid,playful and childish. It was not the best move and i would say that it is the worst thing i ever did as i never try doing it before this that my friend encourage to so i am still here writing stories for you.
It is 9.36 am now. My finals starts tomorrow. Wish me luck. Although the emotions are all stuck in my head, i tried my best getting them out and make them vanish. Played NFS just now and did not manage to overcome one of the stages. I think i tried it for more than 50 times. Almost 2 hours playing the same game on the same route. Dota? Nah. Finals. Got to study . Alone Mayb? Nope. My friends are all sleeping like pigs right now. The wind blows over my skin and i can feel the exhaustion beneath my body. It is going to be a hectic week that i am going to face my final test and hope that i can pull my pointer up a bit. Better than nothing. OMG. My back hurts and i think i am having inflammation in my stomach. The feeling is terrible but nothing is more terrible than what i experienced yesterday. Almost gone to a fight but sleep intercepted so i will just wait. No more explanation is needed and i will not further elaborate on what had happened yesterday. It is going to be a miracle if it did not happen this way.
No big deal. It is just all about feelings. Expression of feelings. Oh god.I am having stomach pain again. Did not know what is wrong with it and hope that i will get over this soon.
I feel so tired right now. I am going to sleep in a minute as someone is sleeping on my bad now. I am so sick of bitches and i hope that i will not come across another kind of same incident again. SLeep is calling me,got to go. Will update soon after my finals .

Dull

2010-04-30T10:20:00.000-07:00

Life has been very dull for me these few days. Next week i have two tests waiting to kill me. DAMN. Studying now but studying alone is very boring and i get sleepy all the time. Food? Had enough though but now eating big apple donuts and i am really getting some weight here. Imagine you are alone in your room reading the lecture slides,listening to music and eating donuts. It totally sucks. Guess what? My mates are having at Ipoh now. They are hitting the club tonight and i am in my room studying. OMG. Fine. Still my life is dull and i do not deny that and i hope my life would be more fun. If my leg is healed by now, i would go play basketball or jogging or even cycling as i need to release my stress from my whole body. So what am i gonna do now? Study? LOL? I don't have much choice, do i? I wanna go back KL !!! Wallet is almost dry too due to excessive spending on food. I have been going mamak alot these two weeks and sleeping late too. No good. Better stop now and go back to my study before i fall asleep again.

It's had been a while

2010-04-26T03:41:00.000-07:00

Wow, did not realize that i have not been updating my blog for almost six months. DAMN. Lazy may be the right excuse but now here i am updating my status and announcing latest news. Been really busy these few months. Don't know what to write now as it's raining. She is in the IRC. I am in my room. Did not know how i fall for her, did not know why i fall for her and did not know whether should i fall for her or not. It's has been a while since i knew her. Few months?. Maybe. People are telling me to act fast, and i mean fast but i was hesitating all the time. Should i? Confession has always been a norm in my life and it is not hard. The hard thing is that am i onto the right one? What if i made a mistake? Rejection? It's alright? NO? I also don't know.
Gonna work on my finals soon. Time is running off the clock and i really have to pay attention now as i do not want to disappoint my parents again. Gotta look forward. Not focusing at my past but in the future. Things have to change. Things got to change. Things are changing. So am i. Let's throw away all the tension and sadness and focus on study. Love is gonna come later so wait. Jogging? Spraint my leg. Have to wait for another 7 days. Sigh.
So missing my friends in KL so much. It's a new year now and i have not been contacting them and i feel really guilty. Never mind. Gonna back in KL on 2nd June. The sad thing is that they may not be in KL. I think they might go holiday with their parents and some of them are still studying overseas as you know the schedule of the oversEAS. LOL. Hungry . When am i going to have my lunch? DAMN. Just finished my field trip yesterday. Tired taking all the apparatus and standing under the sun from 2pm to 6pm. Exhausted. Crazy. Maniac. Lucky i get to drink one cup of Heineken at the last day. Ate the lunch provided but skipped the others and ate outside. No pork though and it is a small town. Boring. Slept in the hall instead of the room provided because you can imagine my suffering if you sleep in a room with another nine people with just one fan spinning so slow that you can almost catch one of its wings.
Sleeping time is getting off and off the clock. 4am? Nuts. Gonna try to sleep earlier tonight. Wonders what she is doing sleeping this late. Assignment? No way. Chatting? I guess so. Ignorable. Love is complicated so i will just solve this question later then. Alright. Stop now. Dinner first.

January...

2010-01-14T20:28:00.001-08:00

Here is the starting of a new year and it's January! First thing first,results. DArn, the credits i get is lower than i expected. A bit disappointed though but i am sure i will work harder in this coming new semester. Nothing has been done this holiday, i don't know what to do during this two months so i just sat at home resting trying to get over my terrible cough for months and helping my mum with some stuff. After i get my results,i am scared and scared and still scared. SCARED. Scared that my mum will scold me like an angry lion and nagging me even i am sleeping. Afraid that she will some into my dream and scold me. There is one thing though that my friend told me just now. He told me that i have to tell my mum now or later she will cooked me up. So,i have decided to tell her later. Earlier scolding the better for me and for us. Ignore the results,now back to the new year celebration. Chinese new year is coming and i am sure that everyone is very anxious to get into it as early as possible. Maybe i will not be coming back for home this new year because our school had given us 2 months of holiday and you expect them to further more increase the period of holiday? DREAM ON!! . So,it's time to straighten your feelings and get yourself back into academics ... AGAIN. I just cannot wait to go back to school and run away from home as i have nothing to do at home except tv and computer and some housework. Wanted to work but feeling lazy. OOpps. Excuse. Just an excuse. xD. Don't worry. Next semester break i will be working somewhere for sure. Hope that i will have a good time at school and have better results in the next few months. Good luck to anyone out there in whatever that they are doing and hope that everything goes well for everyone this year.

Positive,aren't you?

2009-12-22T05:46:00.000-08:00

Are you being positive right now? I am sure you are. Why? Because i believe you. You are not just any human on this Earth. You are You. You are special. So am i. Even the people who are homeless, they are special. They know how to survive without having a proper place to stay. They can linger here and there. Anywhere. They know how to earn money. They are special. So are you. So why are you feeling negative right now? Are you? Think about it. I am always on the negative side too. I am quite a bad-tempered person as you have not taste the other side of me. If you have ever see my angry expression, you will be afraid , you will fear me. But in the normal days, i am just an ordinary boy thinking positive and negative at the same time. Negative have been on my mind for a long time. I am sick of negative. I want to try, i want to know, i want to experience the positive. Positive may bring me more surprises that i can think of. Isn't that right? It is true that positive can bring you more prosperity and happiness. What can negative possibly give you? Anger? Worry? Suicide ? Everything on the corrupted side can bring you all these uneasy feelings. Don't try to be positive. Be positive. Trying something will only make you stand in between two different boundaries. You must do it. I will try my best means i will only do to the extend that i want. If i do my best, i will give out everything that i have and will not feel regret for doing it. Don't ever say that you will try. I know you will not dare to try because you want to sit in your comfort zone. That is just not right. Change. If you believe that you can do it, act from it and i will assure you that you will see the results that you want.

Money...

2009-12-15T06:46:00.000-08:00

Money. Do you love money? If you don't love money,you are not human. They are people who loves money but they are also people who do not put money as their first choice. Is money that important in our life? Yes. Definitely. The only question is whether you think you have enough money in your account or not. Most people will think that they don't have enough money in their life and they wanted more. Why? Because money can buy almost everything in our life. Cars,houses,luxuries,anything that has a price tag on their body can be buy. Even the millionaires think that they don't have enough money in their life. Why? Because they want more from their life and they want to buy everything in the world. They don't care how much the thing cost, they only that if they want the thing, they must get it no matter how much it costs. These people are going after materials and they are quite realistic in their life. Ok. Now, we divert our topic to the youngsters. Nowadays,upper class families usually give their children one or two hundred every time the children want to go out. Can you see that these parents don't care much about what the children use the money for but they focus on the happiness that the children will get after having the money. For the middle class families, they will always monitor their children account, ask them to make a bank book by writing down all the things they bought, where the money goes. Is it so important to monitor their account down to every cent they use? I don't think so. As long as u know what they use the money for, i think it's alright to give the child some money to buy what they like. Money is always a very serious issue in our country as the government are having these people taking bribes and this is getting worst in our country as the oil is depleting and it's a matter time before the Petronas of our country is out of oil and what our country going to do without the main industry? It's still a question.

Life is still life

2009-12-13T09:30:00.000-08:00

Recently,i have been enjoying my life so far. Problem arises,problem ceases. It's just a routine life. Bored with it. Holiday. Nothing much to do. Just walk around the city,do a bit shopping and went to relative's house. Nice holiday. Imagine. 2 girls fell in love with you at the same time. Damn. Cannot imagine that though. It's just tough. Hah. Not easy. But what if you don't even like the both of them( ALthough they don't know each other,i mean the 2 girls). It's kinda hard to reject them. And the main problem is, you fell in love with another girl. That just amazing man. you have your dreamgirl and yet two other girls like you so much. Nothing much you can do really. Act them as normal friends. Greet them as usual. And you all are still friends. I have people suffer from this problem before. Having more than 20 short relationships before,this girl have not been able to find her true love and she still haven't give up. What a daring girl. Moving on when she had most of the hardest time alone in her room sobering. She is still single at the moment and she said that she will keep on trying and jope that luck and faith will be on her side when she finds her true love. Another guy, handsome,well-educated,smart also have the same problem as he had had the kind of experience as what this girl had gone through. I read on newspaper saying think like a woman,act like a man.Although i don't really understand the meaning of that, i am still trying to find out what that really means.

Upside Down

2009-12-09T00:49:00.000-08:00

Recently,my life hadn't been very stable. Emotions are building up and guess what? I get more emotional. Damn. I was about to move on when i have my own problems in my present life. If it is like that, how can i even think about forgetting the past? Quite amazing though. Right now,i am quite upset about my emotions and not able to keep still. Watching all those videos that may inspire me, i haven't take control over my own emotions yet and the process will continue until i am able to control my emotions. I was trying to really understand the meaning of The Secret fully and i am still in the process. It has been quite a long time and sometimes i may use it sometimes i may not. It's all about the timing and thoughts. It's not easy to really understand it though it seem easy for a three years old kid. I am going to really control my emotions now and be still. Learn to be still. Concentrate on what you want and what you don't want will fade away. I have this step in my mind all the time and i practice it too but i am still trying to master this because when i had fully mastered this, trust me, i can become very still and not nervous even in front of a thief.

Although sometimes things weren't that smooth for me, i always keep my mind on the positive side and hope that i will be happy all the time. Emotions and stillness is the key to my future. I may be overemotional sometimes but there are always times when people lost control of themselves and emotions take over them. Emotions are always important in determining a person's attitude and appearance.

2009-11-04T10:55:00.001-08:00

Losing my mind.... Recently.... Damn... Not good.

Smille?

2009-11-03T05:41:00.000-08:00

I was having my test today. Nervous of course. But it's just objective. Simple but complicated. Needs thinking. Calculating. Estimating.Predicting.Memorizing. More. People went out fast and early. When i left, there are only quarter of the students sitting at their places still. He smiles. During the test. Stretches his both hands. Smiles at me. When i look at him. Cannot identify what kind of smile is that. He said. He have not finish reading it half an hour before the exam starts. There he is. Smiling . At me. When i look. At him. I don't care. I was thinking. Blurring. Figuring out the answer. Guessing. A?.B?.C? or D?. Don't know. Don't understand. Don't care. It's had passed. Next. On thursday. One more day. I'm waiting. For it. The final Boom. Close .Near. Gonna. Explode.

Around the corner

2009-10-30T11:54:00.000-07:00

After having a consecutive of tests in my campus, it's the time for the real test. What test? Final exam of course. It's the hardest yet easiest exam if you have prepared fully before the exam. I almost flung all my tests except for some easy subjects such as basketball(basketball??) and English i think. It's has been a tiring week for me as i sleep at 5 or 6am everyday since the last two weeks. So tired. Yet,i tried my best to finish my assignment on time. If you can get full marks for assignment ,you may relax in the final exam. That is for last 2 semesters. Now, i am in a different level. Undergraduate. Not easy. Not hard. And i still have field trip. To kelantan. Now.In hotel.Me. Writing this. Damn. After the field trip,i still have reports to write and it's gonna take out my energy again. I will try my best ti find time to study. The time has come. It's not far from me. I can feel it. I am gonna die. Maybe not. I still can save a few subjects i think. HAHA. Wish me luck for my final exam.

Why Stress???

2009-10-26T21:02:00.001-07:00

Why stress??? LOL. That is what i always say. Today i just have our maths test and one of my friends did a small little mistake that make the whole answer wrong. He was so tension. SO TENSION. I was sitting beside him when the test is going and guess what, i don't even know what the question is talking and he was like writing so fast and i am quite sure that he will get it right as he is the smartest in my class. What happened is he got it wrong in the beginning and he was very upset about it and keeps on blaming himself. I try to calm him down but he said,"Don't disturb me!!". I was smiling and trying to make him to smile too and he scolded me. WTF. After that, he keep on talking about the mistake he made and he is quite emotional too. On the other side, another guy was sitting beside me and telling me that he know how to do and do it perfectly correct. Imagine you don't even understand the question and the guy was showing you his big smile and i feel like giving him a big slap on his balls to tell him that :: Hey!!! Stop showing off in front me or i will hit you with my fist. Then after 5 minutes only the guy beside realized that he had done something wrong. WAKAKA.

AFter that, we went on to the drawing test. It was kinda hard as we are drawing using a computer and it may look easy to you but when you try it, you will know its toughness and difficulty. So, the teacher gave us the question and when we are 15 minutes into the test, all computer shut down. WTF. All the students are shouting and scolding. I was relieved. You know why? Because i don't know how to draw and was asking my friends about it. It was not that hard after all. After the computer restart, we start all over again. All my friends were busy drawing and they draw very fast. Guess what, I was stuck at drawing the model and it did wasted alot of my time. DAMN. They are all drawing other stuff already and i was stuck there for half an hour. After finish drawing the model, our teacher say we are left with less than half an hour. OMG. I was like clicking the mouse here and there faster than the speed of a running rabbit. LOL. I did not finish the drawing. Too bad. Gonna fail again. LOL. The 'showing off' guy finish his drawing and ask me whether i finish o not and i told him,"Nah,don't know how to do." He is still smiling at the moment and say,"Don't pretend man,let me see your drawing." So, i showed it to him and he said it is good. When he said the word "GOOD", i feel like pushing him down to the floor and punch him. I looked at his and WTF, he finished it and ask me just to laugh at me and say i was pretending? I ain't pretending you sucker and i will remember the moment when you laugh and say my drawing is "GOOD". DAMN. It's like someone is laughing at you indirectly. Pretending? FUCK you. When he finished the things fast and he get it correctly, he will always put both of his hands up in the air and smile. Beside him is me still trying to figure out the question. Although i don't really like his attitude,somehow he is still my friend so what to do, tolerate lo...

ALways and Always

2009-10-26T12:47:00.000-07:00

Things might have changed these few years. I looked back and realized that i have done terribly lot of mistakes that cannot be fix eventhough i can turn back the clock. It's hard to believe that i can reach this level with this kind of attitude. It's terrible of me to bring forward that attitude until now and it's still there. For this long time, i haven't manage to change my attitude of lazyness and lying to myself all the time about the truth that has long been there, never changed,never fade and never disappear. I did not do what must be done and this is very disappointing not ony for my family,my friends and all around me. I have many times remind myself of the things that have to be changed and yet i neglect it just after seconds i reminded myself. How can i make such a mistake? There is no turning back and i knew the ending long before it happens. Is it my choice that makes me what i am today? Perhaps. I am still asking myself whether i am in the right place,doing the right thing and the thing is i always think that i am right all the time. It's all assumption. It's just hypothesis. It's probably a guess. WILD guess. So what can i do about it? It is still not late to change. I know that . U know that. We all know that.

The question is : Can i change now? Will i change? Must i change? What if i choose not to change? What will happen? Where will i stand? My future? My dream? Noone knows. It's all up to oneself. That is me. Change. It's always easy to say than to do it. One thing. Believe. I have seen motivational videos,movies, listened to talks, seen the successful people,heard their stories and yet i am still the same old me. Unchanged. Unpolished. Immature. Ineffective. Unproductive. Why? Because i have no confident in myself. And being influenced by what people say about me. You are always like this. If you carry on with this attitude, i don't know how long can you stand. There are always a lot of doubts,questions that you want to get from yourself and yet you cannot answer yourself. Why? Because you are doubting yourself, your attitude, your personality,everything.

This is not the way you and me should live. Start to change. Think. Visualize. Imagine. Believing. Faith. Trust. Honesty. Forget about the old you. Start over again. U are a new person now. You are someone. Someone that can do so much things that other people cannot do. Believe in what you can achieve. Work for it. Go for it. Do something about it. Don't just believe and wait for the fruits to come. Everyone in this world work hard for what they have now, they don't just wish and sit there waiting. So,please go out there and work for what you want. Even now when i am writing this, i am still studying for my test tomorrow. Why i write it down? Because i may not remember this again in the future and this may be important for me and for you. I don't wanna lose it now. Never.

Although things may not seem to be going the right way , i am sure that things will go better soon. Trust. Don't be influenced by what people say about you. Mind about what you say about yourself. Most of the time, people tend to get influenced by what their friends say. So do you think that you can trust your friend more than yourself? If you think that that guy is efficient and have the leadership skills, vote for him. You don't change your mind because your friends say the other guy is better and more efficient. Look first. See for yourself. Then only make your decision. There are a lot mistakes that i have done and i knew i cannot turn back. But what can i do is i will always remind myself about the experience that i had and think three times before i make my decision. Once you have make the decision, there is no running away or hiding form it. It's your choice and you have to accept it no matter what the end results is. That is why i never regret about what i did(although i did regretted for some awful things i done in the past) now and i will always think,think and think.

Meaning

2009-10-25T01:02:00.000-07:00

I am again closer into understanding love. I had seen people falling into love so fast and break up at the same speed too. Love is not easy as anyone thinks. It can start very fast and then it will be up to the both side of male and female to decide how to maintain the relationship or when to end the relationship. It can be very long or very short. There must be argument in this process as if there is no argument, there is no love at all. I have seen the guy overcontrolled the girl and what's gonna happen next, i am still waiting because this is a true story. I also have seen a pair of couples together for a long time and suddenly... Pufff. They break off in just seconds. The guy suggested and the girl suffers. It happens most of the time and the guys are always the one breaking the girl's heart. The girl may cry for weeks or maybe months yet the guy just take it as experience and take no action in talking to the girl. It's sad. There are also girls who are cheap. Don't you know? Have you seen a girl be with a guy for 2 weeks and after one week, she is with a new guy, more ugly than me. Can you imagine? The girl is good-looking yet the guy she is with is ugly. I am not saying that i am better than the guy but look at that girl. It's merely one week. And she is doing this. Damn. She is definitely a cheap bitch. I mean, BITCH.

Why that girl want to do that? Have you wonder? Maybe she is sick of guys breaking up with her in a short period of time and she get used to this short-relationship thingy. That is why she is doing this. But it may not always be the guy's fault. The girl may be the one breaking the guy's heart too. Have you seen girls breaking a guy's heart? Hmmm. Not often but yes. It do happen and when it happens, the guy is the one being hurt. Other than that, the girl maybe overemotional about what the guy is doing. Example, the guy is busy doing things(projects,assignments) with some other "pretty" girls and his girl saw that, she will be extremely jealous man. EXTREMELY. I am sure about this. Girl's jealousy is very strong in the sense that she cannot her man together with another girl for even half an hour. That is why. When the guy tries to explain, the girl will think that the guy is trying to cover his ass. So, what happens next? Break up of course. The girls will be crying and the guys will be begging. Yet, the girls give no chance to the guys to explain and in the end the guy gives up and the end of the story.

I am sure that you have seen many of this cases before. You may also experienced it before. It's just a share of stories. Many have been complaining to me about this matter and they are crying at the moment when they are telling me this. I wrote this down because i think it's an important thing that you should know. It may not be useful now but it will be in the future. If u think that u are already a pro in this, think again. Even i am still learning,watching and listening to people's stories and try to learn something from it. Hope you learn something too.

2009-10-11T06:50:00.001-07:00

Long break and stress out....

2009-09-25T07:57:00.000-07:00

It was a long break since i wrote my last post. Sorry guys and girls but i was very very busy recently due to exams and i slept very late at 4 or 6 in the morning and have to wake up at 7. Thats the worst week and cause me to take the consequences. My face was in very terrible condition until now and i am going to my uni tomorrow. Sad. Cut my hair. Cut all my hair. My mom. Forced. The hairstylist said sorry to me too cause he cut almost all of my hair. So sad. @.@. Yet i feel very sad at the starting but after few hours,i think it's time to change me. Change myself. The old me was lazy and sad. Now i shall transform.Konon. :D . This week holiday sucks. Nothing to do at the first weekend. Tutor to my little cousin. For 3 days and i got bored. So i stopped and went back home. REst for 2 days and went out with my old schoolmates to KLCC. Watched "Where got ghost" and "Gamer" . Gamer is a piece of shit and where got ghost is extremely hilarious. Went to watch G-force with my sister the next day that is today. Rated ok by me because i watched "up" before that and "up" is much better and touching than this G-force. So thats all for now. Tired. Eyes closing . Assignments are calling my name. Damn. Too bad. I am going to assignments only when i reach uni tomorrow. Tonight i wanna do nothing but online. Line in uni sucks. Real sucks.

First day back at school after 2 months BREAK!!!

2009-07-12T08:27:00.001-07:00

Life don't suck, only you suck... I was back at the school today and guess what ... I had no room and have to sleep with Mr.Fu Ann. Zzz.. It was a boring day. REached at 3. Play basketball at 4. Saw a RaBbIT???... lol... Fu Ann call the RAbbIT ...(censored).... haha... Then later at night we went and had dinner outside and it was quite a good meal... FOR now... What happened next?... Bad things happened. A cat run and pissed in front of F.A's room and the 'liquid' TERtouched the broom beside the door and F.A used it to wipe his keyboard. And guess what.. He knew about it and he became the angriest man i ever seen on EArth. The whole block was tumbling because of his voice echoing around the block. Well that's all for now.. Because i haven't buy a cable to connect to my laptop so i cannot online after this ... F.A is calling me.. HE WANTS THE CABLE..>.<... See u all later.. b

Kellie's Trip

2009-04-20T20:07:00.000-07:00

So we went to fetch my roomate yesterday. After fetching him,he asked that where we wanna go before going back and then someone just said,'Kellie's Castle'.(=.=') Fine. So,we drove to Kellie's castle and walked inside. Then,we realized that we have to pay to get in. So,we just paid and continued. These are all the pictures that we managed to get before leaving and it's not bad actually. Kellie's Castle

Does this looks like a bear? It's a bear.

This is a underground tunnel that is connected to the Hindu temple nearby.

This is the rooftop.REally high dude. And there is no fences to protect you. So if u fall,Bye bye.

Corridor is in the mystery??.. Must come n see by yourself.

The picture taken from the top. Not bad. Dirty.

There are two parts in this Kellie's Castle. The second part is tumbling down due to world war 2.

The part is almost destroyed.What is left are walls.

The ancient door looks weird and creepy.Scared...

The starting picture. It's not that big actually.

Not bad. quite nice. Boring still.

Not a SEcreT anYMOre...

2009-04-15T12:41:00.000-07:00

OK,ok. I know this might sound weird and u will be wondering where i got these pictures. It was accidentally copied into my pendrive. So,i am quite astonished when i first saw these pictures. What the hell are these 'guys' doing? Tell u what. I don't know. And i still don't know until now. So,if u wanna know the answer,go ask these guys. I am not responsible for this although they look a bit gay like me.(>.<) If u see clearly,there is one picture where there are underwears around a pail and guess what,i don't know whose one is it and the answer lies within these guys. Don't worry,these guys are not gay actually,i am sure that they are doing something legal for now,i cannot comment more on these pictures as i am not there when the pictures are taken so i don't know the feelings happening around there and the 'joy' too. Still,u can ask them for more info if u wan. A banana??? Interesting dude.

They look like a sweet happy couple with a 'BANANA'

What the hell??? ... Are u guys(the underwears) lost??

Wow,they look so sweet that i even don't recognize them....

Oh,what are u going to do with him???

What is the white shirt guy doing??? =.=''

Are u going to kiss him??? If u don't want,i want...

Happy Easter Party

2009-04-13T08:23:00.000-07:00

Wow!! So,Easter party is today and i am too lazy to follow belden to his church so i slept till 12 and i went out for lunch with andy and michael. So,Andy invited me to his church's Easter party. I hesitated for a while and said,'Ya,sure'. So,we went back and had our clothes changed. After that,we went to the church. The name of the church is Church of Praise. Indeeed, i met my friends there and we had singings and talking. I love the singing. They are very energetic and i had a great time there as i relax and enjoy myself. After that,we received an egg and the eggs are cute,dude.
Everyone got one egg. YEAH!!! ....

I will not talk much on this so i will just upload all the pictures and hope u all enjoy it....

The picture we took before leaving the Church... I enjoyed it ,man!!!

EGG,EGG,EGG!!!!! Hahahahahaha.....XP

Everyone is enjoying themselves!!!!

The stage used with musical instruments..

Smile,dudes!!!! Andy look so serious ...DAMN...

New Life??? New Place??? NEW???

2009-04-05T06:32:00.000-07:00

Since i left my old school,i kept thinking about it but i did not do anything about it anyway. After i moved on to national service,i did the same thing and till now i am still doing the same thing. I just don't understand why i did not contact my old friends and have a gathering then? I am just confused. Although now i still keep in touch with my friends with msn or gtalk or phone,for me, it is just not enough for me and i think that i should do something. So,what i did is messaging them and the results? Dude, you don't wanna know. It's not considered sad but some of them have already left the country and some of them is going the same way too. As for my old school,there are more malays than chinese. So,most of my malay friends have further studies at aboard and they are just having a nice time there. Anyway,how am i going to contact them? I have no idea. Do you think that friendster is sufficient? No. If some of you have girl/boyfriend overseas,better watch them carefully as they have more space there and can do anything they like without you noticing. Back to the topic,as most of my upper secondary school friends going to leave the country, i am left with no choice but to wait for them to come back. Although we have gatherings last time,the duration of it was not sufficient and we separate after having a movie or a bowling match. Ok. For the lower secondary school,that time i am still very young and from form three till now, it is already 4 years and i have almost forgot the most of their names but i still recognizes their faces. I regretted the most is when i am in the lower secondary as at that time, i have the best experience i have as form 1 till form 3 is three years where form 4 till form 5 is only two years. The experience i had in lower secondary was invaluable and i remebered all the trainings,scoldings,firing,mistakes,fun,joy,love,fines and that is the most free times for me actually. I really enjoyed it. At the time,i tried everything i can from running,stealing,scolding,flying,beating,flirting,eating and more. I just cannot forgot that time but that time is also the time when i have the most arguing with my mom as i reach home every day late as i was busy with activities and i was very committed. So,now i am in a new school,with new friends and with no old friends that i have known, i am feeling a bit bored still but now that i have get used to the people here with all kinds of attitudes and faces,actually there is no difference with my upper and lower secondary school. I still have my friends,i still can enjoy myself but there is a limit where i must stop and start focusing in my work. The thing that i regret the most is that i have almost,considered lost contact with my old friends and that is not good actually. So,what i hope the most now is that i keep in touch with my old friends and gather with them when they come back...............

Pain??..... >.<

2009-03-26T06:14:00.000-07:00

What is pain? We always say that pain is what we feel? but is it true?... tired is a kind of pain?? needles is a kind of pain? operation is a kind of pain? ... What u know about pain??? I can tell u that u have not feel the real pain. I just feel the real pain in my heart today. Still the pain is not in my heart. It is physical pain. Physical pain sucks. If u think that falling down on the floor in a kind of pain,that is just some ant-biting pain. The real pain is still far ahead. I was in that room when the pain comes. The shining silver monster with the two fearless hands went to me without hesitation and i feel like being dip in the hot,burning volcanoe rocks. I wanted to shout but the energy left inside me was not sufficient and i used the energy to hold back all the pain. I will not tell u what the pain is all about but i think that u can figure that out.... soon. The pain was burning in my face and my heart but i just do not have enough energy to fight against the pain. After the pain is gone,i was taken out from the volcanoe but the effects lives in me. What is lucky is that a transparent thing was put on me and i feel the relief for a while but it does not stop there. The pain continues as the cold,shivering,chilling liquid was flowing on me and the pain comes and i can tell u the pain is kind of pain where your leg have a big wound bleeding when someone accidentally pour a cup of salt into the wound. What will u feel??? Pain of course!!!!.... I hope that i will recover from this exp in a short period as it really makes me realise what the real feeling of pain is .... Although the pain of a bullet coming through my heart is not tested yet.....

What a meaningful Valentine!!!!!

2009-02-17T04:00:00.000-08:00

So,today is Valentine's day. What am i going to do? Not sure but i am going to Ipoh for sure. I plan to wake up a 11a.m and guess? I was waken up at 8 o clock. DAmn!!! For what? To take our rented car.I was forced to wait at the roadside when i am too tired and decided to take a short nap. Tired la.. Michael!!! Let me sleep next time,please.

So,we went to Ipoh as planned with two cars.In the first car,there are Michael,me,Ella,Zhong Ying and Ma. The other car are Andy,Ming Xian,Venice. We started the journey at 12pm and have lunch at Marrybrown. I think i will just skipped the evening part as i don't have any excited pictures to show u. But i sure have to tell u this first. There are lots of leng lui and they are absolutely hot. Besides that,u can see almost every guy have a bouquet of flowers in their hands and even some of them waiting outside for their girlfriends. So u think that Valentine's only got couples? I heard one couple quarelling terribly outside Kbox and the girl is dumping the guy. Damn embarassing man!! And the headlines, there is one big fight at the food court. The guy was hitting another guy and his gengs went and helped him. This is really fascinating and my friends were very frightened and we dare not to move. Imagine more than 20 people hitting one man in one of the famous shopping complex in Ipoh. And sadly the security failed to catch the guy. What a miss.. After that,we went o K-box and after that we went for dinner. We were driving along the road when we saw this....

Beautiful,isn't it?? Zhong Ying insisted to take this picture.

So,we found our way to this weird little restaurant beside the road and the restaurant was not that attractive at the beginning until i and Michael noticed the beautiful lighting and decoration in the restaurant and we decided to take pictures in that restaurant....
Group photo dude!!! Ella's eyes look like GHOST!!!

Yeah!!! The two most handsome guys tonight!!!

Andy and Ella,doing promotion for the restaurant,Terima Kasih!!!

The brother and sister,Zhong Ying and Ma!!!!Ma is mat blur!!!

Left side is the Witch while left one is the ordinary girl,XD

They look like an non-suitable couple,right????

So,that's the pictures we took after we realize what the restaurant can provide us. After that,when I and Michael were in the toilet,i suddenly realize the unique of the toilet and quickly grabbed a few photos...
Handsome or not??? Sure handsome la..

Oh... I enter the toilet for this picture???

The pictures were taken in the men's toilet and the pictures were not badly taken though. And guess what,we found one corner of the restaurant which has very nice furniture with fantastic lighting and interior design that i have the courage and power to take the photos...
Wrongly posed dude!!! Paiseh.....

CAn they really be husband and wife??? Noone knows.

Oh,i am very sorry,ladies and gentleman as i forgot to put on the pictures of food but the food was not that good either and i cannot eat as i drank too much beer and the gas were still bubbling in my stomach....
The steamed baked rice with ham,Yummy!!!

Oh,this is the lamb chop i supposed and it look disgusting!!!

So, There were a few "GOTCHA" pictures exclusively from me and my 'geng'. It was taken unaccidentally and no harm done anyway.

What an innocent picture,isn't it? Pity this little girl,mom.

What is the meaning of this picture???Do you think that this is very funny????

End of the story at the restaurant.I also don't have any more pictures but i sure can tell u what we did after that. We went to tesco for shopping and Mcd for nothing. On the way,there were a lot of blue lights flying through the road at 2a.m and the view was amazing that we have no time to take the pictures. Because of all the blue lights,we got stucked in the jam for half an hour as all the VIP were heading to somewhere,maybe HELL. After that,we went round in Ipoh when we finally decided to go clubbing. But it wasn't clubbing dude as it is already the ending and we just had a jar of beer and walked out of there but one unique thing about the club,its door is fantastically done and it is very beautiful man!!! After that,we drove to Setiawan just for breakfast and i got scared out of hell by the dog as i was waking Ella and Michael up. They were sleeping like babies. Lucky the dog did not bite me though as i am too scared and hide in the car. Lucky the owner came and took the dog away. What a relieve!!! After having breakfast,we went back to our school and there are still lots of incidents that i did not tell u because of private and confidential.Remember,the names used here represents nobody!!! Want to know more??? Come to me,please... Thank you for your cooperation!!!

Must we have one???

2009-02-13T08:54:00.000-08:00

Must u have a girlfriend or boyfriend??? Give me your comments,ladies and gentleman. Although i know that everyone should have a boyfriend/girlfriend but have u think of why u should have one? Because of sex?,her/his appearance?,because of smartness?,because of her kindness?,or because she can be a good wife?? Ask yourself. Before u want someone to be your girl/boy friend, u must think why she is suitable and are u good enough? Are u really in love or u are just an ordinary playboy? Think again. If u want a girl/boy friend because u want to try new one or different style,let me give u an advice,"FORGET ABOUT IT,PLEASE". U are just wasting your time, energy,money and everything. If u are in a desperate condition for one,follow my instructions. First,be happy. Second,don't worry,she will be by your side any moment. If u follow my advice,u will just live your life happily and with less problems and stress. How if your friends have boy/girl friends and u don't have? Don't worry. Don't be envy. Don't be stress. Don't hate them. U should feel happy for your friends and wish them the best and they will do the same thing to u in the future. Trust me. What if the girl you like don't like u? This seems to be a sad condition though. Still,don't worry as if the girl did not become your girl/boy friend,i am sure that she will always be taken care and as a friend of her,u can still help her and asist her in any problem she face. Ok. Now the harder question, What if the girl u like already have a boyfriend? No worries,man. If she have a boyfriend,it means that her boyfriend will love her more than u love her and she will have a happier life. Why? Because when she had a boyfriend,u will feel upset and she will feel the same thing too. So,just treat her as a very close friend of yours and help her and u will eventually treat her as a friend later on and your life will just become better and more meaningful. So,during this Valentine's day, i wish everyone have their sweetest moment of the day and for those who are still single,don't worry as the girl in your life may just be the girl live next to your house.

Is it Really Important???

2009-02-13T03:45:00.000-08:00

Valentine's day??? . Is it really important? U still can see a lot of couples walking on the road still, isn't it? So what's the significance of this day? For guys who have girlfriends,they will enjoythis day full with meaning and have the best day ever with their girlfriends. For me, I do not have a girlfriend so i will just hang out with my friends. What if u have a girlfriend?? Where would u go? What if u do not have a girlfriend? Where would u go then? ... For guys that do not have a girlfriend,they will say that they have more freedom and can know more people and at the back, they will be like very envy of other's people happiness together with their girlfriends and wish to have one too. As the old man says,behind every man there must be one woman supporting him and end of the story. What if the man have two girlfriends? Is he going to cut himself into two?? No way man. AS i walk through all kinds of love matters and problems,i start to realize that girlfriend is indeed important yet for me,friends are the most important. So, i would like to say soorry to my future girlfriend first and still i will love her with my heart. Valentine's day is just around the clock. So, are u alone in the room doing nothing Or are u having the sweetest time with your girlfriend??? Think yourself....

Valentine Day???

2009-02-10T01:54:00.000-08:00

I knew that valentine day is just around the corner. What can i say?? Everybody is having their happiest day in their life(for those who have girlfriend(s)) and i am just wondering what am i going to do. Will i even remember that this day exists?? I don't think so. What's the meaning of this day? Maybe i am just too young enough to really understand the true meaning of this day. However,Michael have invited me today to K-box at ipoh and i am just thinking of fooling around in school by disturbing other couples. Maybe i am too naive.Ok. i will not disturb whoever that is having fun on that day. Yet,i still have to find my entertainment. Is entertainment that important for me?? Can i live without it?? I don't know. In my heart,i know that i can live but still i need entertainment. So,back to valentine's day, maybe i will just be in my room surfing the net and doing some revision if I CAN. I also noticed that in this second sem,my friends all are having girlfriends and not to say that i am jealous because i am not handsome enough YET and i am wondering why they need a girlfriend at this period. Not to say that i want a girlfriend too but i am not that desperate though. For the past few years,i had my own girlfriend and now that i am single again, i have lost track of the meaning of love. I have lost beneath the world of joy and work and forgetting the love is in the air. As i am watching everyone of my friend falling into the cloud of love,i am wondering whether i want to do it or not. You can feel the joy when your friend gets a new girlfriend but can u feel the love when they are in love?? Can U? I don't know man. It's just too complicated. Maybe i will find my way back slowly to understand the true meaning of love and at that time, i will feel the feeling of falling in love.

WAs that an excuse???

2009-02-01T03:26:00.000-08:00

The day before i came back,i went out with my friends at times square... After that,when i was on the way to lrt station, i thought of my friend who was free only on saturday due to her work and i did promised her a lot of times that i will take her out and belanja her ice-cream. She was tied to her work as she was very busy with her work even on sunday. So,my promise was not fulfilled and i was very regretful about that and i felt very upset about that. Before this,i had fong fei kei for twice when i called her out. She was very furious at that time and luckily she got her friends with her and she forgave me. Although i still call her "sometimes" but i did not do what i should and i am not a good man. As i was throwing that thought far away from my mind, i was heading into the lrt station when i saw her...... The girl that i fong fei kei and the girl that i promised an ice-cream and the girl that i want to go out with..... At that instant,i was totally stunned.... It was a second glance and i thought that she won't recognise me at that time so i just continued my steps. I had the feeling of turning back and called her name but .... i was speechless and i did not have enough courage to do that.... I cannot believe my eyes the second i saw her and she did not change at all.... She was the old she and i did not have any changes too.... What was the excuse i have??? ... Nothing.... What kind of excuse can i create for myself? I have no idea... Do i deserve to have an excuse? I don't think so.... And she is going to have a bf not long from now as i know or she may already have one ..... But i don't think that she is going to hang out much with her bf as she have work and she is going for national service soon ,March.... But what can i do? ... After a long thought,i decided to stand back and .... i don't know..... i am blur... i am lost .... i am .....

20cents???

2009-02-01T03:18:00.000-08:00

It was the last day i will be in kl and i was having dim sum with my family. When the bill comes,my mom was stuned by the results and started asking the dim sum fellow and the dim sum fellow told my mom that if u eat in another restaurant,the price will be double than the price here so my mom was not confident of the answer and asked the dimsum fellow how much each dish cost and was complaining about the price and the dimsum fellow got fed up and told her,"Aunty,these dim sum(s) are not expensive because we only increase the price of each dish by 20cents NIA!!!!" At that moment,my mom was silent but seconds after that she continues to complain and complain and we left that place unpeacefully.

What a FRUSTRATING day With Money$.$ and the F.Seller

2009-01-24T04:10:00.000-08:00

This is the second day i stay at home.24JAN. I woke up a 1oam. My grandmother was scolding me for not waking up early for breakfast. I was feeling so lazy and tired that i sat at the living room for few minutes before my mom came back and told us to go shopping. I was feeling NOT anxious at all and it's so sianzzz. My father arrived at home at 2pm. My mom was telling us to change early and wait for her. When she reached home,she was so furious that we are not prepared and she went off to decorate our house. After i had my bath,i called them and told them that i was prepared and we jump up to our Avanza and drove off. After reaching The Store, we find for parking and we were lucky to find one near the entrance. After my parents got out off the car, a seller came to my sister and told her that he is promoting the newest scratch cleaner and were demonstrating when my sister were frightened because she just stepped out from the car and a stranger approached her. What will u feel??? .. If i am in her shoes, I will just ignored him and walked away. I thought he was going to do something "terrible" when he approached my sister because he was carrying something like a toolbox and i am wondering if there is a gun,knife or even a bomb inside XD ... So,my sister saw the "noob" guy and she decided to leave him alone and i quickly catched up with her. After we went in, I and my father went to the guy's department while my mom and sis went to the ladies'department. I bought two shirts and one pants and my father bought pants and two T-shirts and guess the total amount.... RM3++..... I almost fainted after knowing the total amount. After that, we went downstairs to buy drinks and foods. Guess What, my mom bought two box 16tins of carlsberg and one box with 24 tin of guiness. Only this two stuff the amount was Rm256 and my sis were scolding my mom for buying too much alcohols. The total was 4++ including foods and my sis were stil scolding and pissed off. There was noone in the house that will drink alcohols(except ... ME!!!) and only our relatives that will drink three boxes of alcohols. My mom said that she will just buy the "Alcohols" but my sis was still scolding and strongly disagree with my mom because she hates people who drinks. After that, we went out to buy Soya Bean and other drinks when We found out that the price for Carlsberg outside was cheaper than the inside one by 0.88 cents per can. My sis were scolding again for not coming out first and wasted "a lot" of money. There was nothing we can do at that time so we had finished our shopping and headed for our car. When we reached our car,the seller REAPPEARED with his "companions" and was still promoting the scratch cleaner and was wiping our car. My mom feels irritated and keep telling the seller that she had bought the item long time ago and ignored the seller. The seller did not stopped there and walked away but keep on bullshitting until my mom tells him the same thing at a higher,angrier tone and this time the seller was pissed off and walked away. I thought everything would end at that time when one of his "companions" told my mom that the seller was pissed off and keep on PROMOTING... If i were "his companions",i will just walked away quietly and act that the incident did not happen. My mom keeps rejecting him and tell us to go into the car. So,with the seller and "his companions" giving up on us, we were feeling so relieved and i was so pissed off that if i have more people on my side,i will just tell them to FUCKEd off. YouSUCKS!!.... It is a very frustrating day for the whole family and we went back peacefully.

Fucking SHIT!!!!

2009-01-22T10:02:00.001-08:00

That is my idiom for the day before i go back for chinese new year..... DAMN!!!!

A Bllaaccckkk CLOUD!!!!!

2009-01-22T09:27:00.000-08:00

So,i finally went back to my college. I was a bit shocked when i knew that most of the chinese had moved upstairs. What is left is only three chinese rooms downstairs. Upstairs were almost all chinese rooms and had become a China Town. I was just thinking of staying at my old room when my mom tell me to swift upstairs too. I do not really agree with her but even my roomate said yes so i was left with one choice that is move upstairs. I had to call few malay guys when one said that i can move in so ..... i moved in. The first day was boing like hell as i had nothing to do except playing game. So i will just skip to the next few days because the days i skipped is the same boring days. Monday was the day i hace my first class and i have to rush to register my lab sessions and tutorial sessions. On the monday night, my friend told us to play "game". I was so anxious and cannot wait to play it right away. It was like Genting Highlands. Unfortunately,'my friends' were not on my side. Anyway, i managed to reduced my loss and continue to the second day. On tuesday, i stopped playing because i was too tired and slept late too. Wednesday was not my day too. As i was walking into Genting Highlands, I thought my luck was good that day and i had too much 'friends' with me that made me lost too . It was quite a day as i managed to reduce my loss again and get on to the next day.I will just skip to thursday night as Timmy wants to sleep so i was forced to speed up my typing and i am tired too... Thursday night,the night before i go back home on friday,that is today, i knew that i will continue my lossssss when i lost the first game.. I do not believe my luck and i continued the game. The sky above me was getting dark and my friends were climbing to Mt.Everest while i was falling down from the Tiagara Falls. I continue to play and play and play and play...... UNTIL .... I was swimming in the pool of debt when i almost fall to my tears and I was not eligible to continue the game.. and i was sinking into the pool of debt. That was the last match of my game and i cannot play when i was back home.. At the moment when i was stepping into the pool of debt,the sky above me was already raining and i was striked by the lighting more than 10 times. The feeling of sinking into the pool of debt and striked by lighting was the worst i had. I realized at that time my luck was sucked until the last drop and i feel so helpless at the time. So, the moral story is control yourself and watch the sky above you.

CAn you do The CLeaning?????

2009-01-14T01:43:00.000-08:00

So you think you can dance??? It's just the same when you ask yourself can you bear the tiredness of doing the "home"works ALONE??? It's not easy at all.... For me, this is my first job of clening the house. I was required to clean two fans;one in the room and the other one at the living room. I thought the job was going to be extremely easy as i did it before last year. First,you take five chairs and stack it together.Then,you stand on the stack of chairs and for your information, i am scared of height. So, i went up without 'fear' and start cleaning the 1st fan. The dust stick on the wings of the fans like the nail sticking in a piece of wood and i have wipe up the dust with two times my strength. Besides that,my grandma was standing beside the chairs and keep telling me,"Ah Ti,come down la!! ENOugh LAAAA!!!!". It sounds like she is screaming at me and she is stopping me from doing my job. I knew that i was doing it too slow but what to do, i am tired. I used 40 minutes to clean the 1st fan. Although it's tiring,i am very satisfied with the results because the fan was as white as the snowman!! When i was going to take a break,my mom called me and from that second on,i knew that was something wrong. Guess what, i was given the second fan to wipe. DAMN... Although the second fan look cleaner,i thought that my job was easier so i put the chairs on and start cleaning. When i make my first touch on the fan,i realize that this fan is harder to clean than the second one BECAUSE someone cleaned the fan with a dry cloth and the dust stick to the fan and become very dry. When dust become dry like the Sahara, you not only have to apply two times energy and you have to clean the same place for at least 4 times to DESTROY the dust. So,do you think you can do this??? Lucky i have the radio with me in the room so i turn on the radio and continued my job. After cleaning the second fan, i was exhausted and physically tired. Can you guess what i do after cleaning the fan??? I took my laptop,on it,connect to net and I started writing this thing...

Results show and New year arrivesss

2009-01-12T06:50:00.000-08:00

So,i have waited so long fro my results to come out and i am very impatient about it because our school should be efficient enough in coming out with the results in a short period yet the results came out late.(about end of dec, i think). Guess what??? My results was like HELL!!! My mom was not satisfied.(like usual...) I even think that i am the worst among my friends yet Kong said to me,"Yeo,our results are not meant to be compared". After i heard what he said,i was glad for a while.Then,i vowed to stand up again and give it all to score and get a better result. I am also not surprised when i knew that most of my friends scored above the sky and i knew that they truly deserved it. Good job,guys!!!
Now,Chinese New Year is just around the corner and i know that everyone is busy preparing for this day.This year,i do not really feel the excitement of this coming chinese new year because i have school and i know that most of you have applied for a longer period of holiday and i knew that everyone will get their application approved and going back to celebrate chinese new year so i want to wish everyone an early HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!!! Hope that everyone have their targets,objectives and new resolutions and once again good luck and enjoy your new year holiday.

What a Holiday!!!!

2008-12-11T07:06:00.000-08:00

This end year holiday is damn bored!!!!... First, Kong and Ck went to my condo for two days ... That was not bad and i enjoyed myselfvery much ... but after that.. i lost track of everyone and soon i was not going anywhere until now ... what a mess!!!... haiz... i want to be free and i demands freedom!!!!... Please help me!!!!.... although i am always at home these few days, i started study icis and it' not that hard after all ... then i moved on to physics ... wow... physics is going to b a lot harder next SEm so my friends,put on your seat belt and accelerate forward ... Good luck to u all .... bye ...

Pankor Trip ... The Best ever i HAD!!!!

2008-12-04T11:42:00.000-08:00

It's 7.30am in the morning and we are getting prepared to go to Pangkor island... We reached the jetty about 10.00am.... and what happen is two cars are lost ... Puven and Wei Di took the wrong route(if i am not wrong)... so we wait at the shop across the road. Meanwhile, some of them wanted to have some morning exercise in the toilet. And what happen is the toilet fee is RM0.50 and there is nothing much inside except that it is big.

Some of them are chatting outside while the others are in the toilet .. Where are the others that are lost???

After we meet,we find for the ticket counter and managed to squeeze in to the ferry. For your information,we ran towards the ferry with smiles.

Yeah!!! Walk faster la,turtles!!!!

After that,we went up to the roof of the ferry and start enjoying the view. There are a lot of people and my face in the picture look like a noob because my hair got messy and the cameraman sucks that i tak sempat smile.

Everybody is smiling except me... Who is the cameraman!!!!

The BIS Geng!!!!...

The petroleum geng!!!!

The Mechy Geng!!!

Look at this two guys. So happy and smiling. Shock sendiri gua...

This is our leng zai superman, Leon the Big!!!

This is our leng zai brother ,KING!!!!

Guess who is he??? He is one of the organizers,CK!!!!

This is my basketball sifu, Wan!!!!

All lengzai on this ferry!!! Yeh,can u spot the special guy???

I want to apologise if your picture(follow course) is not inside because i am not the cameraman. I am just the blogger. Any aduan please dial 444. Now,we are still in the boat enjoying the wind and sceneries until we reach the Pangkor island.After reaching there, we took two taxis and went to the hotel . Unfortunately, we only can check-in at 3.30pm. How inconsiderate the hotel is!!!! So we waste no time and went straight to the sea. There is really nothing there so we start planing what we are going to do first.

Let's look at sea and think what u gonna do. And it's hot!!!

So what we do is take off our clothes and jump into the water. Although it's 12pm at that time,i can see their eagerness in trying out the sea in Pangkor,so what i can do??? .... and what you cannot think of is this.....

Make it fast!!! It's hot in here!!!!

Phewwww.... After having a nice bath in the sea, we went the nearest chicken rice shop to fill our stomachs.

WOw! The chicken rice here is not bad though..

After having our breakfast,we decided to check-in earlier so that we won't waste anytime... The resort is not that big but it's consider high class with a swimming pool and one little bridge beside it if you notice....

A white resort and the resort we are to going stay ...not bad ,not bad..

We went to visit this castle(forgot the name) and it's quite nice with some crafts....
It writes that this is some Kota Belanda and it's not bad after all...

On the way back, we saw this cute little monkey biting a fruit... (or maybe it's still hungry)

That's all for now... You know the time??? It's 4.54am and i am writing this ... please let me have a sleep ... Thank you .... I will finish this later .... i promise....

The Triple Brothers Day???(With Sisters too!!)

2008-11-08T14:15:00.000-08:00

Today is my three friend's birthday.(though it is not for one of them...hehe)... we have plan a big birthday party for the three of them ... who are the Mighty Chang Yi,the Genius Leon and the Generous Belden. The three of them are my close friends for more than 3 months. So,i and the others and the Organiser, Fu Ann,have a long-timed planned party for the three of them. First,we bought a map for Leon. Why a map? Don't ask me.. Ask Leon...

A completed map with wishes from Leon's friends from different states!!!

After that,Fu Ann and Ming Xian went to Batu Gajah to search for a 'Power Ranger' cake for Chang Yi .... There is a sad story why we bought a 'power ranger' cake for Chang Yi ... He asked his aunt for a 'power ranger' toy(if i am not mistaken)during his 8th years old birthday.Instead,his aunt bought him a pencil box. He continued asking for the power ranger toy till now and he never gets it. So,for him to have a memorable birthday,Ming Xian and Fu Ann went all round Batu Gajah and luckily Chang Yi's roomate have a pair of sharp eyes and spotted the cake. They quickly bought the cake and brought it to the party.What a relieve!!!

During the party,Leon came with other friends and i am the one responsible to climb like a monkey to turn off the light while Chee King lighten the candles ... Then,we sang the birthday song for Leon and he made his wishes.

Leon holding his own cake on his hand and smiling!!!

He later cut the cake and divide it into small pieces.

Faster take my photo!! I am the man today!!!

Leon was persuaded to take off his pants and guess what??? He did it and did it proudly ....

What u looking at??? Never see a man take off his pants?????

Besides that,Chang Yi also presented a special 'dance' for Leon.....

Leon,hope u like the special dance for u ... U ROCK,MAN!!!

When we are ready for the next activity,SUDDENLY....... Leon was attacked by more than five pairs of hands...and what happened is.....

What can i say??... This guy is innocent!! Who did this to him????

After that,we watched a video specially made for Chang Yi by Fu Ann and the others...Chang yi was so touched by the video,he cried.....

Everybody was watching the video with full attention while Chang Yi was sobbing silently without anybody noticing.....

When we are packing things up,we felt that we had missed someone.... Oh,No!!!!!......BELDEN!!!! .... So, we planned to give him a surprise by finding him at the Undercroft..... On the way......

Yeah!!!! Let's go!!!!.... Give Belden a Surprise...Faster!!! .... Belden,here we come!!!

Two handsome guys.....Are you two gay???

Let's pay our respect to the cameraman... Thank you,camera!!!!

Let's walk towards our location,fellows!!!.. Move on!!!... No cycling,PLEASE!!!!!

Finally,we reached the undercroft.... The big group was divided into two and will run to Belden in two directions.... We went down and give Belden a warm birthday song.... Then,Leon went up and hugged him....

Happy birthday,man... (Luckily i am still not late to wish u ,hehe)....

Come on,let's take the picture of the Triple Brothers... Say CHEESE!!!!

Guess what, the story does not end here... looks like the three brothers have sisters too .... Although i am not sure whose birthday is it but i don't mind having two sisters ....

Yeah!!!...Gotcha!.... So which one is the birthday girl??? huh???

So,after wishing the two sisters happy birthday,we decided it's a day and we are all exhausted... Then,when we are walking back,someone ran towards the window of library and drew this....

Happy birthday,guys...and girls.... hope u have a good day and the story ends!!!!!

I am so excited about this birthday party and decided to write my first blog ... i spend the whole night till morning to finish this blog... hope u all enjoy reading it and remember to give comments about it... Thanks!!!!

My Very First Time .....

2008-11-08T11:14:00.000-08:00

It's my first time creating a blogger account and i am very curious to see what it looks like .. Although i am not going to use it often from now but i am going to use it everyday after my final exam ... so please continue to view my blog and don't miss the nice part of it ... Thank you very much!!!